IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

You work at home and have a problem with a piece of equipment that you bought for your job. Write a letter to the shop or company to which supplied the equipment. In your letter: - describe the problem with the equipment - explain how this problem is affecting your work - say what you want the shop or the company to do

#work #home #piece #equipment #job #shop #company
Dear Sir or Madam, My name is Daniel, a web designer, and I bought a monitor from the store on the 1st of May for work-related reasons.
This
 equipment arrived earlier today and I am writing
this
 letter to you to complain about an out-of-the-box malfunction and propose a solution. First of all,
this
 monitor is missing
it's
Correct your spelling
its
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 charging cable, which I imagine, is related to a big hole on top of the cardboard box it arrived in. Maybe it fell off the truck during delivery.
This
 is causing me to use an old
falty
Correct your spelling
faulty
 and exposed charging cable I own, giving me concerns with safety and durability. Second of all, since I am a web designer,
color
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colour
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 precision and depth are much important to me. Even though
,
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apply
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 the hardware depicts a deluxe quality to the product, it is not
case
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the case
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 when it comes to the software. My projects exhibit a wide range of
color
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colour
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tone
Fix the agreement mistake
tones
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 and saturation, which are not
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
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fully displayed on
this
 screen
due to
 a lack of
color
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colour
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 control.
Lastly
, I tend to mainly use HDMI cable when working, because of the quality and
it
Correct word choice
because it
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 is a worldwide standard. Imagine my surprise when I came to discover
this
 monitor does not follow that standard. It does
no
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not
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 have a HDMI output port. If you could get in contact with me to schedule a delivery day
of
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for
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 a new substitute monitor and for retrieval of the one I just received, I would very much appreciate it. Thank you for your understanding. Yours sincerely, Daniel.
Submitted by Danarvelini on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure clear paragraphing with each paragraph presenting a single issue for greater coherence. Keep the logical flow by connecting ideas and paragraphs smoothly.
task achievement
For a higher score, maintain a more formal tone consistently throughout the letter and avoid overly casual phrases.
task achievement
Address all the bullet points in the task with enough detail. Expand more on the impact of the problem on your work and possible consequences if it is not resolved.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

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