IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Your are stayig at your friend’s house who is travelling to another country. A recent strom damaged the house. Write a letter to your friend and say What happened and when What was damaged in the house What needs to be done about it

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Bennet I want to inform you about an accident which happened
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 your
house
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 when you
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
journey
Correct article usage
a journey
show examples
. The Inadzuma storm damaged your
house
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 large thunder. I couldn't really do anything
while
Linking Words
 it happening.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, now we can fix and upgrade your
house
Use synonyms
. For the most part, the roof
damaged
Add a missing verb
is damaged
show examples
 more than other parts of
Use synonyms
house
Add an article
the house
show examples
. Now it
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 a lot of holes.
Then
Linking Words
 your fence fell to the ground
due to
Linking Words
 thunder. But the saddest thing is your mailbox disappeared. I really tried to find it, but I couldn't.
Overall
Linking Words
, we can fix your
house
Use synonyms
, if you return from the journey a bit faster. Fortunately, Nahida can help us, because she is in our village. We can
easely
Correct your spelling
easily
 repair your
house
Use synonyms
, raise the fence and
then
Linking Words
 find your
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
 mailbox somewhere. And if you want, we can upgrade your
house
Use synonyms
 to another level. With love your friend Eula.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
To improve your score, you should ensure that your letter follows a clear and logical structure. Start with a proper introduction, follow with detailed paragraphs each focusing on a single aspect of the situation, and conclude with a summary or a call to action.
coherence cohesion
Your greeting and closing could be more appropriate for the situation and your relationship with the recipient. Consider using expressions that accurately reflect your concern and the nature of the news you are delivering.
task achievement
While your response covers the topic, providing more specific details about each aspect of the damage and how it affected the house would enrich your letter. Additionally, suggesting a clear plan or steps for repair and recovery can enhance your task achievement score.
task achievement
Adopting a suitable tone is crucial in letter writing. Even though the situation is unfortunate, an empathetic and supportive tone can convey your concern and willingness to help more effectively.

The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • severe weather conditions
  • structural integrity
  • mitigate
  • immediate steps
  • insurance claim
  • repair estimates
  • temporary fixes
  • contractors
  • coordination
  • overseeing repairs
  • valuables
  • reassurance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: