Your are stayig at your friend’s house who is travelling to another country. A recent strom damaged the house. Write a letter to your friend and say What happened and when What was damaged in the house What needs to be done about it

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Dear Bennet I want to inform you about an accident which happened
with
Change preposition
at

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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your
house
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma before the dependent clause marker when. Consider removing the comma.

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when you
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were

It seems that the verb was does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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journey
Correct article usage
a journey

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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. The Inadzuma storm damaged your
house
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

by
Change preposition
with

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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large thunder. I couldn't really do anything
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it happening.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, now we can fix and upgrade your
house
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. For the most part, the roof
damaged
Add a missing verb
is damaged

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

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more than other parts of
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
house
Add an article
the house

The noun phrase house seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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. Now it
have
Change the verb form
has

It appears that the subject pronoun it and the verb have are not in agreement. Consider changing the verb.

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a lot of holes.
Then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

your fence fell to the ground
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

thunder. But the saddest thing is your mailbox disappeared. I really tried to find it, but I couldn't.
Overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, we can fix your
house
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, if you return from the journey a bit faster. Fortunately, Nahida can help us, because she is in our village. We can
easely
Correct your spelling
easily

If you don’t want easely to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

repair your
house
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, raise the fence and
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

find your
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite

The spelling of favorite is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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mailbox somewhere. And if you want, we can upgrade your
house
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to another level. With love your friend Eula.

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coherence cohesion
To improve your score, you should ensure that your letter follows a clear and logical structure. Start with a proper introduction, follow with detailed paragraphs each focusing on a single aspect of the situation, and conclude with a summary or a call to action.
coherence cohesion
Your greeting and closing could be more appropriate for the situation and your relationship with the recipient. Consider using expressions that accurately reflect your concern and the nature of the news you are delivering.
task achievement
While your response covers the topic, providing more specific details about each aspect of the damage and how it affected the house would enrich your letter. Additionally, suggesting a clear plan or steps for repair and recovery can enhance your task achievement score.
task achievement
Adopting a suitable tone is crucial in letter writing. Even though the situation is unfortunate, an empathetic and supportive tone can convey your concern and willingness to help more effectively.

The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • severe weather conditions
  • structural integrity
  • mitigate
  • immediate steps
  • insurance claim
  • repair estimates
  • temporary fixes
  • contractors
  • coordination
  • overseeing repairs
  • valuables
  • reassurance
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