Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying to alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is positive and negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, the majority of
people
prefer
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
alternative treatments rather than consulting their doctors and these preferences can be perceived either as positive or negative developments. It is essential to analyze both sides of the coin to understand the broader impact on individuals and communities. On the one hand, with the increased number of
people
, it is unrealistic to expect doctors to give attention to all their patients. The reasons,
such
as insufficient hospitals and inadequate medical staff, pose obstacles to enhancing facilities in the medical sector. Especially,
people
in developing countries face expensive medicines that they cannot afford. Another reason is related to environmental
concern
Fix the agreement mistake
concerns
show examples
advocated by ecology activists.
For instance
, the production of some medicines not only adversely affects the environment but
also
impacts living creatures.
On the other hand
, the overuse of herbal remedies may damage internal organs, potentially leading to the need for a kidney transplant.
Furthermore
, the consumption of herbal products to which one is allergic can result in skin reactions. Another drawback of relying on alternative treatments is the difficulty in distinguishing well-intentioned practitioners from those with malicious intentions within
this
field.
As a result
, it makes
people
susceptible to being deceived by these kinds of
people
.
For instance
, with the advancement of social media platforms, nowadays,
although
influencers promote health products that are not reliable,
people
who watch them tend to buy these products. In conclusion,
while
the ongoing debate on
people
's preferences for alternative remedies is widespread, I advocate the importance of striking a balance between the two treatment methods. In the view of my bias, it is neither a positive nor a negative development.
Submitted by aleynacanacikel on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Consider varying sentence structures to enhance readability and create a more engaging argument. This can involve employing complex and compound sentences more effectively.
task achievement
Ensure the essay prompt is fully addressed by discussing both sides of the argument more evenly and providing a clearer opinion in the conclusion.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to support your points. Providing concrete examples makes your argument stronger and more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical or spelling errors, as they can slightly distract from your main points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: