Some people believe raising the price of fuel is the greatest way to address global environmental issues. Do you agree or disagree?
In the modern era, environmental
problems
are a huge part of people's lives. It is believed by some people that raising the expenses of fossil fuel can tackle these kins
of issues Correct your spelling
kinds
while
others disagree. I fully endorse the second attitude because of the negative effects on the economy and low-income families and the existence of some better solutions which I'm going to explain more about in the rest of this
essay.
To begin
with, high prices of fossil fuels can negatively affect poor families. For example
, some individuals have old disel
trucks and don't have sufficient money to buy new ones. So, expensive fuel can deteriorate their financial condition. Correct your spelling
diesel
Therefore
, their children and wifes
can Correct your spelling
wives
get
deprived of having an appropriate education which hinders the growth of Verb problem
be
community
. Add an article
the community
a community
In addition
to not affording things that can improve the quality of their lives, sometimes it can collapse their families and lead to depression and other mental problems
for members of society.
Besides
to
financial Change preposition
apply
problems
, there are other alternatives to encourage individuals to use other kinds of cars
like electric ones. China, for instance
, decided to reduce the price of electric cars
and electricity to entice society away from buying gasoline cars
which led to its status as the country with the most electric cars
on the road in 2023. Hence
, lowering the cost of electric vehicles can can
be an important step toward becoming carbon neutral till 2050. Remove the redundancy
apply
Additionally
, it can also
contribute low-income
members of Change preposition
to low-income
community
Add an article
the community
to spend
less on transportation and Change the verb form
spending
save
more money for other important issues.
Wrong verb form
saving
To conclude
, there is an ongoing controversy about whether governments should increase the price of gasoline or not. I oppose incraesing
the price of gasoline because of Correct your spelling
increasing
financial
Correct article usage
the financial
problems
it can cause for poorer members of community
and better solutions like reducing the expense of electric vehicles which are more efficient and helpful for both humans and Add an article
the community
environment
.Correct article usage
the environment
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task achievement
Be sure to directly address the task. While you mentioned that raising fuel prices is not an effective solution to global environmental issues, ensure that your response fully addresses why it's not the best method and explore both sides of the argument more deeply for a balanced discussion.
task achievement
Improve the clarity of your main points by more directly linking them back to the question. Make sure that each paragraph clearly supports your argument in relation to the impact on environmental issues.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of your essay is commendable. However, make sure to use a variety of linking words and phrases to enhance the coherence between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your introduction and conclusion are both strong and directly relate to the topic at hand. Restate your thesis in the conclusion and briefly summarize the main points of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Use specific examples to support your claims. While you mention the situation in China regarding electric cars, further details or additional examples could strengthen your argument.
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