many graduates want to start their first job in a big corporation. many others prefer to work for a small company first. compare and contrast their choices and express your opinion

#graduates #first #job #corporation #work #company #contrast #choices

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After getting a Bachelor's degree, we all need to find

jobs

that provide us with earnings for a living. Some believe that starting their first

jobs

at reputed

companies

will support their working experience in the future,

while

others believe beginning their

jobs

at small corporations can benefit them better than the large ones. For me, I prefer working with big

companies

. In the following paragraphs, these both views and my opinion will be outlined. Working in the high reputation

companies

, of course, will provide you with tremendous experience and

also

a lot of

skills

including soft

skills

such

as communication, teamwork or creativity and hard

skills

for instance

using computer programs or typing. As they are big

companies

, they know how to manage and distribute their work effectively and efficiently to their employers.

Moreover

, they give you a good background in your CVs or resumes. Future

companies

which they will enrol will have confidence in them and notice that they have gained tremendous experience from the previous.

On the other hand

, beginning their first job in small corporations grants them a variety of experiences. Not just what they achieved and received from their own courses in the universities,

this

is now very significant in the job markets as they want to hire fewer people

while

incrasing

Correct your spelling

increasing

efficiency. Workers need to finish all the given tasks and meet the deadline which some of them might get stressful as they do not have someone who can supervise them or give them advice to close their

jobs

Additionally

, These people will get promoted swiftly compared to the ones working in big organizations. In conclusion, I definitely select large organizations as they are more reliable and trustworthy. Despite the fact that the salary depends on the structure of the company which sometimes is quite low, I will gain a lot of

skills

and have someone who supports me or teaches me in the first place.

Submitted by nnatthinee on Mon Apr 15 2024

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Task Achievement

Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effective, but try to ensure a more balanced discussion between both viewpoints before stating your preference.

Coherence & Cohesion

Use a wider range of linking words and cohesive devices to improve the flow between ideas and paragraphs.

Task Achievement

Incorporate specific, real-world examples to substantiate your arguments further. This will enrich your essay and make your points more compelling.

Coherence & Cohesion

Pay close attention to sentence structure to avoid run-on sentences or overly complex constructions that can make your arguments hard to follow.

Coherence & Cohesion

You've effectively included an introduction and conclusion that bookend your essay nicely, establishing your thesis and summarizing your arguments.

Task Achievement

You demonstrated a strong understanding of the task by comparing and contrasting the benefits of working for large vs. small companies and clearly expressing your personal viewpoint.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

322 words

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many graduates want to start their first job in a big corporation. many others prefer to work for a small company first. compare and contrast their choices and express your opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extend do you agree or disgree with this stagement.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development

Living in country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems to what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?