The provided pie charts show statistics of granted degrees at the National University from 1990 to 2010.

The pie graph gives information about the proportion of accepted degrees at the National University in 1990, 2000, and 2010 divided into

computer

science

medicine

law

, and

bussiness

Correct your spelling

business

department

Fix the agreement mistake

departments

show examples

Overall

computer

science

is the most popular school in 2010 and 2000.

However

, in 1990

computer

science

and

business

have

Wrong verb form

had

show examples

the same admission number.

Furthermore

law

school

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

the least popular

between

Change preposition

among

show examples

all

department

Fix the agreement mistake

departments

show examples

in all

year

Fix the agreement mistake

years

show examples

. In 2010,

Law

Correct article usage

the Law

show examples

and

business

department

Fix the agreement mistake

departments

show examples

Wrong verb form

shared

show examples

the same amount of total scholars. Meanwhile,

computer

science

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

the most number of students and

medicine

has the least number compared with

computer

science

but

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

the most scholars referred to

law

and

business

On the other hand

medicine

is unpopular compared with

computer

science

in the

year

Fix the agreement mistake

years

show examples

2000 and 1990.

To conclude

computer

Correct article usage

the computer

show examples

science

population

is continue

Change the verb form

continues

show examples

growing

Change the form of the verb

grow

show examples

over

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

time from 1990 to 2010.

Nevertheles

Correct your spelling

Nevertheless

medicine

and

law

have

fluctactive

Correct your spelling

lucrative

growth but

business

pupils

Change the verb form

are

show examples

shrinking over the period.

Submitted by hafidhfikri.rasyid on Mon Feb 26 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words computer, science, medicine, law, business with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

156 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers ahould be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe thay should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these view and give your own opinion.
Few individuals think that jobs like doctors and engineers should serve their motherland where they get training, whereas others believe that they should go to foreign countries where they want. I support the former view because of my own state development.
7
band
Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by the governments rather than private companies. Do you agree or disagree?
At present, scientific research across the world is carried out and controlled sometimes by governments, and sometimes by private companies. While there are some arguments in favour of scientific research by corporations, I agree with the view that this should be funded and supervised by the state.
5.5
band
Nowadays, some work place tend to employ equal numbers of men and women workers. Do you think it is positive or negative development?
The tendency of employing an equal number of men and women workers seems to keep increasing in some workplaces in this day and age. From my aspect, I reckon that it is a positive development in the case of separating properly depending on each field.
5.5
band
Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Professionals should be required to work in the country where they did the training. Although some believe that they should be free to work in any other country if they want. This essay will discuss both these views.
7
band
The diagram below shows the process for recycling plastic bottles. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
The diagram presents the process that how plastic bottles be addressed and reproduced in a specialised factory. Overall, the entire cyclical process consists of 9 main steps, including collecting, crushing and reproducing.

The provided pie charts show statistics of granted degrees at the National University from 1990 to 2010.

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers ahould be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe thay should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these view and give your own opinion.

Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by the governments rather than private companies. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, some work place tend to employ equal numbers of men and women workers. Do you think it is positive or negative development?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The diagram below shows the process for recycling plastic bottles. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant