The chart shows the unemploymsent situation in Australia in the year 2012. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparision where relevant.
The line graph provides the rate of individuals unemployed in
Austalia
per Correct your spelling
Australia
quarter
of the year in 2012. Use synonyms
Overall
, Linking Words
it is clear that
the highest rate of unemployment was in Rural places in the first period, Linking Words
while
Urban Linking Words
areas
were the lowest.
It is Use synonyms
intresting
to notice that in the first Correct your spelling
interesting
Use synonyms
quarter
Urban Add a comma
quarter,
areas
had approximately 2.5 of unemployment, Use synonyms
Whereas
in Rural places Linking Words
were
around 6.5 Correct subject-verb agreement
was
Use synonyms
percent
. The proportion of unemployment increased slightly in the first Change the spelling
per cent
quarter
. Use synonyms
Afterthat
, there is Correct your spelling
After that
Correct article usage
a signifcant
signifcant
fall in the second Correct your spelling
significant
quarter
of the year. Use synonyms
Moreover
, Rural Linking Words
areas
had Use synonyms
increase
in the same period. Add an article
an increase
For example
, it was almost 4.5 Linking Words
Use synonyms
percent
, Change the spelling
per cent
then
Linking Words
increase
to nearly 5.5 Wrong verb form
increased
Use synonyms
percent
in the following year. Change the spelling
per cent
In addition
, there was Linking Words
Correct article usage
a consderable
consderable
rise in Correct your spelling
considerable
Uban
Correct article usage
the Uban
areas
it was around 2 Use synonyms
Use synonyms
percent
, Change the spelling
per cent
then
became 4 Linking Words
Use synonyms
percent
in the same period.
In conclusion, the lowest rate was in Urban Change the spelling
per cent
areas
, but Rural places were the highest.Use synonyms
Submitted by kazza735 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words quarter, areas, percent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼