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Writing Samples
Band 6

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#businesses #emphasise #products #development
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Thanks to advancements in technology, the number of business sectors has witnessed significant growth, resulting in heightened competition across many industries. In the pursuit of prominence within their respective sectors, businesses tend to emphasize the quality of their products and services. In my view,
this
 is largely a negative development. A profound understanding of why businesses emphasize that their products are new contributes to grasping the competition in the business world.
This
 essay will discuss both the positive and negative aspects of
this
 development.
Firstly
, one positive aspect of emphasizing the quality of a product is the opportunity to increase revenue and profit.
This
 is the most prevalent method used to persuade people to seek either high-end brands or high quality through advertisements. Individuals captivated by advertisements tend to care about features that are emphasized.
Therefore
, in these industries, it is understandable to pursue a reputation.
On the other hand
, the goal of standing out among counterparts may result in the monopolization of one brand. People tend to consume or buy what brings them an elevated status;
therefore
, the preference for solely one brand gives rise to the collapse of other brands.
For instance
, the marketing strategy of Apple related to
iPad
Correct article usage
the iPad
show examples
 led to a predominant preference for
iPad
Correct article usage
the iPad
show examples
 among tablet computers. In conclusion,
while
 there are both positive and negative aspects, it is essential for businesses to find a balance for fair competition.
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Task Response
To enhance the task response, provide a more balanced view that directly addresses both the question of why businesses emphasize that their products are new, and whether this is positive or negative. Attempt to provide equal discussion on both aspects to fully meet the task requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, ensure a smooth flow of ideas between paragraphs. Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to better connect your points and make your argument more persuasive.
Task Achievement
Incorporate more specific examples or evidence to support your points. This helps in clearly illustrating your arguments and makes your essay more convincing and relevant to the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
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