Some companies sponsor sports and sports stars as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Around the world, advertisement endorsement business
marketting
Correct your spelling
marketing
of brands and their products. Many
associations
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association's
associations'
show examples
sponsorship
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
teams and their
celeberities
Correct your spelling
celebrities
to gain fame and popularity among
target
Correct article usage
the target
show examples
population is considered beneficial by some individuals.
Whereas
many others are opposed to
this
notion. In
forthecoming
Correct word choice
the coming
show examples
paragraphs
Add a comma
paragraphs,
show examples
I will elucidate both perspectives in detail
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and will throw my assertion with some
stand out
Add a hyphen
stand-out
show examples
examples. First and foremost, there are innumerable pros for organizations who are using diverse marketing strategies
such
as making
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
popular
players
and different sports
team
Fix the agreement mistake
teams
show examples
a part of their promotions. To be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
more precise, if any brand or brand
product
is commercialise
Change the verb form
is commercialised
show examples
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
renowned
Add an article
a renowned
show examples
athletic team or team player,
consequently
, it draws
significant
Correct article usage
a significant
show examples
impact on laymen, and they will be intended to buy that item or
product
of
specific
Correct article usage
a specific
show examples
brand because
famous
Correct article usage
the famous
show examples
personality was
wearing
Correct pronoun usage
wearing it
show examples
. A standout example is here, redbull drink became common among youngsters after watching social media ads, which showed
prediction
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predictions
show examples
of
atheletic
Correct your spelling
athletic
players
that
this
soft drink keeps them energetic and agile all day long
while
they play.
To
Change preposition
From
show examples
the
stars
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star's
stars'
show examples
and
sport
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sports
show examples
groups
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groups'
group's
show examples
perspective, by the
companiese
Correct your spelling
companies
company's
support
Add a comma
support,
show examples
they
also
get
fimilarity
Correct your spelling
familiarity
similarity
in
audience
Add an article
the audience
show examples
.
On the other hand
, there are some cons, which are faced by
sponsord
Correct your spelling
sponsor
associations as they use
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
teams and popular
players
for advertisement. They have to pay
immassive
Correct your spelling
massive
amonts
Correct your spelling
amounts
amount
of money
then
successful teams and
celeberities
Correct your spelling
celebrities
agree with them to be a part of their advertisements.
Moreover
, to enhance the sale of products they both
sponsord
Correct your spelling
sponsored
companiese
Correct your spelling
companies
and
players
forget
Fix the infinitive
to forget
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people's health.
For example
,
pepsico
Correct your spelling
PepsiCo
Pepsico
company billboards and commercials during cricket matches put on great
emphasize
Replace the word
emphasis
show examples
on community
memebers
Correct your spelling
members
by using sportsman in their ads even though we know
pepsi
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Pepsi
show examples
drink
Fix the agreement mistake
drinks
show examples
have hazardous effects on our health.
This
is completely unethical .
To conclude
,
sponsord
Correct your spelling
sponsor
organizations should advertise any
product
with great
conscientious
Replace the word
conscience
show examples
. In my assertion merits of up above mentioned statements
outweighted
Correct your spelling
outweigh
the demerits.
Therefore
, it is
a
Change the article
the
show examples
best way to build insight regarding any
brnad
Correct your spelling
brand
and
product
among
target
Add an article
the target
show examples
population.
Submitted by amnamunir764 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure, but it can be improved. Consider clearer paragraphing and more distinct separation of ideas for enhanced readability.
Coherence & Cohesion
Include a brief introduction and conclusion that clearly state the topic and your opinion. This will help in making your essay more structured and connected.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your main points are supported, but consider using more specific and varied examples to strengthen your arguments.
Task Achievement
Cover the task comprehensively by discussing both views equally and clearly stating your own opinion. Make sure your opinion is consistent throughout the essay.
Task Achievement
Use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures to express your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. Try to incorporate more detailed and specific examples to support your points.
Task Achievement
Proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve overall readability. Avoid overly complex sentences that could hinder clarity.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Brand Visibility
  • Financial Support
  • Positive Brand Association
  • Market Penetration
  • Ethical Concerns
  • Pressure on Athletes
  • Sponsorship
  • Globally popular
  • Reputation
  • Demographic groups
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