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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #ten #countries #production #consumption #electricity #information #features #comparisons
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The given representation illustrates the first 10th countries which both generate and use electricity by themselves in a period of a year in 2014.
Overall
, as can be seen, China takes the first place in each of
which
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.
However
,
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Korea has the
lower
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
amount
 during all tenth.
While
 other countries consumed less power than what they
Wrong verb form
generated
show examples
generate
Wrong verb form
generated
show examples
, what
is
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
 stands out is the reverse for Germany.
To begin
 with, China is a leader
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
 chart by producing and using
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nearly
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
amount
 more than 50000.
Moreover
, after the most
user
Fix the agreement mistake
users
show examples
 and
producer
Fix the agreement mistake
producers
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 electricity, the USA is followed by around 40000 in both fields,
While
 Russia has third place, other ones use and generate nearly the same
amount
.
Finally
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Korea
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
consumed the least
amount
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
slightly less than 5000 each  
Submitted by amirisoodabeh24 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words amount with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • dual aspect
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • industrial base
  • population size
  • significant difference
  • surplus
  • deficit
  • electrical energy
  • ranking
  • economic patterns
  • industrial patterns
  • technological advancements
  • disparity
  • industrial development
  • economic capabilities
  • anomalies
  • export
  • import
  • energy efficiency
  • waste
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