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Band 7.5

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantage of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

#future #cars #buses #trucks #driverless #people #vehicles #passengers #advantage
Nowadays, individuals who are above a certain age need to pass some exams to have driving permission. In today’s climate, the issue of
driverless
vehicles
 has become a controversial minefield.
While
 it is rational to accept that automatic cars can sometimes have negative effects, it seems that it is more likely to bring about benefits. The main justification why using auto-driver cars would not be fruitful is the fact that it can lead to decreasing job opportunities for humans. The main job of a significant number of people is driving and they provide their initial necessities with the money which they earn from driving.
Therefore
, by implementing robots or artificial intelligence, drivers would be jobless, and
consequently
, they face financial and social problems. Another drawback is that
driverless
vehicles
 cannot have a suitable reaction in case of unpredicted accidents. An illustration of
this
 fact is break failure which can lead to unfortunate events. Human drivers know what to do since they have many experiences and the power of decision making which do not exist in
driverless
vehicles
.
On the other hand
, it could be argued that
this
 pitfalls are not comparable to its merits. The first plus point is the fact that
driverless
vehicles
 would not have human errors.
In other words
, an overwhelming number of bad accidents are caused by human mistakes like not paying attention to the traffic jam, not using guidance lights, or even drunk driving,
while
driverless
vehicles
 will be planned to obey driving rules. The next advantage which can lead to making instant killing for transportation companies is that they do not need to pay salaries to drivers. Not only can it reduce monthly expenses but
also
 can make a profit since they are tireless and can work constantly. What can be concluded from the discussion revolving around
driverless
 transportation systems is that their benefits surpass their possible drawbacks.
Submitted by ashkanmlk80 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure a balanced approach to discussing both views by expanding on each viewpoint equally to enhance task achievement.
Task Achievement
Integrate more specific examples and evidence to substantiate your arguments, adding depth to your response.
Coherence & Cohesion
Aim for a clear and logical progression of ideas throughout your essay. Use a variety of linking words to enhance cohesion.
Coherence & Cohesion
For a fully rounded discussion, consider adding a paragraph that explicitly compares the advantages and disadvantages before drawing your conclusion.
Task Achievement
In the introduction, clearly state your opinion to guide the reader on your stance from the outset.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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