Animals are in danger of extinxion. Some people say that we should protected only those animals, which are useful to humans. Do you agree or disagree?

Some
species
of
animals
are in threat of extinction. Some individuals consider that humans should reserve only beneficial
animals
,I completely disagree with
this
point of view and I believe both domestic and wild
animals
should be protected. The main source of food and nutrition for humans often are provided through domestic
animals
such
as
:
Remove the comma
apply
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cows, sheep ,and chickens.
Due to
this
fact and reason, some
people
, who are often uneducated and uninformed think they have to only protect
this
type of
animals
, so they have no duty to take care of other creatures.
Moreover
,
this
group of
people
are of the opinion that the protection of wildlife
animals
and rare
species
is money and time-consuming.
While each
Correct word choice
Each
show examples
type of animal has a direct or indirect impact on human life and the environment. In order to prevent distraction in the nature cycle
people
should be careful when they will come to the intact jungles or far-distant areas.
For example
, if traveller will camp in some natural places, should avoid throwing away their litter and garbage.
Due to
the fact that some trash becomes infectious in the environment and leads to disease when some
animals
eat these,
also
sometimes some of
rubbish
Add an article
the rubbish
show examples
like canes may harm their bodies. If these events happen for rare and endangered
species
, these will have irritable effects.
For example
, mice are necessary to do medical tests and scientific research if
people
in some ways lead to damage and extinction
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, scientists will face vital issues during their experiments. In conclusion, I fully support the view that all
people
are responsible for the protection of all
species
of
animals
, both domestic and wild
animals
.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that introduction and conclusion clearly define your stance and summarize your argument succinctly. Current articulation is present but could be sharper for impact.
coherence cohesion
Consider using a wider variety of linking phrases and topic sentences to begin your paragraphs, to guide the reader more smoothly through your arguments.
task achievement
Clarify and elaborate your main arguments more distinctly. Each paragraph should start with a clear main idea, followed by explanations or illustrations relating to your viewpoint.
task achievement
Incorporate more detailed examples to give weight to your arguments. Consider using statistics, studies, or historical examples related to the conservation of different species, to strengthen your position.

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