Some countries have introduced a law to limit working hours for employees. Why is this law introduced? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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The rule of working
hours
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for workers has been introduced by several countries. Personally, I think
this
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is a positive
development
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for the working environment at the workplace because overwork impacts worker’s performance and reduces their productivity.
This
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essay will discuss the reason why the regulation is required and the positive impact on national
development
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
To begin
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with, the government is aware of the dangers caused by excessive work
hour
Fix the agreement mistake
hours

It seems that hour may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. When
individual
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individuals

It seems that individual may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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work more than normal working
hours
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, it will expose them to many diseases
such
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as nervous
disease
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, heart
disease
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, and mental illness.
For instance
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, the number of people with mental illnesses
such
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as depression and anxiety disorder is increasing because of high levels of pressure and overworking
hours
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. The second example is the
employee
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who works day and night and has leisure
time
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to exercise becomes affected by heart
disease
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.
However
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, if the people who have productive age become unhealthy it will be dangerous for the
development
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economy of the country. The impact of limiting working
hours
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for employees will be advantageous for the nation's
development
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. In terms of the public sector, the number of people who suffer from the illness can be reduced if the worker has more
time
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to relax.
For instance
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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employee
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

who have a life balance between work and leisure
time
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to exercise or relax themselves healthier than those
employee
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

who haven't
time
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for themself. Afterwards, the economy of the nation will develop because of the impact of productivity and performance increases by employees.
For example
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
the
Correct article usage
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It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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worker who
have
Change the verb form
has

The plural verb have does not appear to agree with the singular subject the worker. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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well-being
Add an article
the well-being

The noun phrase well-being seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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of mental can make good ideas and quick responses for their job which will increase the productivity and income of the company. In conclusion, the government made a regulation of working
hours
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

because aware of the dangers of
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

case,
such
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
disease
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Moreover
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

law will make the
employee
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

more productive and increase their achievement to develop the income of the company and the country.

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Coherence & Cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures more to avoid repetition and make the essay more engaging.
Task Achievement
While your main points are supported, try incorporating a broader range of examples and evidence to strengthen them further.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure all paragraphs have a clear main idea and that they are directly linked to the essay question to maintain a high level of coherence.
Task Achievement
In your introduction and conclusion, clearly state your stance on the issue to make your viewpoint more transparent to the reader.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • productivity
  • well-being
  • fatigue
  • stress
  • mental health
  • innovation
  • leisure industry
  • economic impact
  • labor costs
  • competitiveness
  • workforce
  • part-time workers
  • shift workers
  • sectors
  • cultural shift
  • personal time
  • global impact
  • standardizing
  • employee well-being
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