IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Typically there is trend towards the use of alternative forms of medicine. however, at best these methods are ineffective and at worst they may be dangerous. To what extent do you agree to this statement.

#trend #alternative #forms #medicine #methods
There is an undeniable fact that consuming
diverse
Add an article
a diverse
show examples
 range of
medicine
Fix the agreement mistake
medicines
show examples
 these days experiencing upward inclination,
while
 it is believed that they are either harmful or unproductive.
This
 essay will argue
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
why using different
medicine
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 totally useless or hazardous. On
one
 hand, some believe that utilizing miscellaneous medicines not only
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
 not pose any threats to
Add an article
the consumer
a consumer
show examples
consumer
Fix the agreement mistake
consumers
show examples
 but
also
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
helps patients to heal
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 most occasions. They think people can alter the type of
medicine
 being used, based on their illnesses to obtain more effective results and to see
weather
Correct your spelling
whether
show examples
 the other type leads to better
outcome
Fix the agreement mistake
outcomes
show examples
.
For instance
. There has been enough evidences of herbal medicines which is prescribed nowadays that shows enhanced
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
show examples
 that could been
otherwise
 if they had not consumed them.
Therefore
, they strongly trust in them and make use of them.
On the other hand
,
due to
 some negative influence of
such
 prescriptions ,others suppose that not using of right choice of
medicine
 by
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
 directly
impress
Verb problem
impairs
show examples
 their health and in some special cases
pave
Correct subject-verb agreement
paves
show examples
 the way for unpredicted and unknown deaths among people which is inevitable in majority of the cases.
For example
, no
one
 can deny that ordinary people can not diagnose the cause of illness and may use exactly
wrong
Correct article usage
the wrong
show examples
medicine
instead
 of
prescribed
Correct article usage
the prescribed
show examples
one
; or even worse
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
use some type of
medicine
 without consulting with
physician
Add an article
a physician
the physician
show examples
. Ultimately ,
risk
Correct article usage
the risk
show examples
 of using alternative
medicine
outweigh
Correct subject-verb agreement
outweighs
show examples
 the possible health to be provided. In conclusion,
this
 essay
argued
Wrong verb form
argues
show examples
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
why the speculation of using substitute
medicine
 can not be effective
along with
potential
Add an article
the potential
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
dangers which are somehow hidden from our sight. I strongly believe that
one
 must not take
medicine
 in that the result of using remains obscured unless there is an approval of expertise in
this
 regard.
Submitted by keyhan454 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Focus on developing a clear thesis statement that addresses the essay prompt directly. This will help guide your argument and responses more effectively throughout the essay.
task achievement
Try to enrich your essay with more detailed, specific examples. Detailed examples help to illustrate your points more vividly and strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on linking ideas and paragraphs more smoothly by utilizing a range of linking words and phrases effectively. This will aid in creating a more cohesive and coherent essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea, supported by relevant arguments and examples. This structure aids in maintaining coherence throughout your essay.
coherence cohesion
Review the use of appropriate vocabulary and sentence structures to avoid repetition and enhance the clarity of your ideas. Diverse language use contributes to cohesiveness and coherence.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: