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Band 7.5

Some people consider that people should learn that all people and beliefs are equal. Others think that variety is important in life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #beliefs #variety #life
In contemporary discourse, the tension between advocating for
equality
 and celebrating
variety
 pervades discussions on societal values.
While
 some emphasize the importance of recognizing the equal worth of all
individuals
 and beliefs, others highlight the enrichment that diversity brings to human experiences.
This
 essay will delve into both perspectives before offering a balanced conclusion. Supporters of
equality
 argue that it forms the bedrock of a just and inclusive society. By recognizing the inherent dignity and worth of every individual and belief system, societies can foster tolerance, acceptance, and social cohesion.
Equality
 serves as a bulwark against discrimination and prejudice, ensuring that all members of society are treated with fairness and respect.
Moreover
, promoting
equality
 paves the way for social justice, guaranteeing equitable access to opportunities and rights regardless of one's background or convictions.
Conversely
, proponents of
variety
 champion the diversity that enriches human experiences. Exposure to different perspectives, beliefs, and cultures fosters creativity, innovation, and intellectual curiosity.
Variety
 encourages
individuals
 to challenge conventional thinking, leading to greater understanding and appreciation of the world's complexity.
Moreover
, diversity cultivates resilience and adaptability, equipping
individuals
 with the skills necessary to navigate the ever-evolving landscape of human interaction successfully. In conclusion,
while
 both
equality
 and
variety
 offer valuable contributions to societal harmony and progress, a balanced approach that acknowledges their interconnectedness is essential. Embracing
equality
 ensures fairness and justice
while
 celebrating
variety
 enriches human experiences and fosters innovation. By striking a delicate balance between these ideals, societies can create a vibrant and inclusive environment where all
individuals
 and beliefs are valued and respected. Ultimately, it is through the synergy of
equality
 and
variety
 that societies can aspire to achieve their fullest potential.
Submitted by writingbhos on

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Task Achievement
To further improve your essay writing, consider adding more specific examples to support your points. While your ideas are clear and relevant, tangible examples can provide more depth and persuasiveness to your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a well-organized structure and good use of transition words, contributing to its clarity and effectiveness. To enhance it further, focus on varying sentence structures and employing a wider range of vocabulary, particularly with synonyms for frequently used terms. This will add sophistication to your writing and hold the reader's attention more effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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