Nowadays, there is more and more competition for getting into university. Is this a positive or negative development?

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High
education
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institutions now are constructing strict policies towards
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students
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student
show examples
admissions.
While
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others may point out the negative impacts due
the
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to the
show examples
pressure caused by alleged "unreachable criteria", in
this
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essay I will discuss the certainly positive impact that
this
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meassure
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measure
provides to
prospect
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prospective
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students
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due
the
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to the
show examples
cultivation of ambition in young minds,
as well as
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a the
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a
the
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creation of a high steemed cohort of future makers.
The access
Correct article usage
Access
show examples
to higher
education
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is a privilege, one that must be earned by hard work and dedication.
Thus
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,
this
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criteria steers
students
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into maximizing their efforts in order to reach the goal of accessing the world of
high standard
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high-standard
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education
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.
For example
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, Ivy League universities
such
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as Harvard,
Princenton
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Princeton
or Yale, are recognized
by
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for
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their low rate of admissions (around 4 to 5
percent
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per cent
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) since their
education
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represents a non-comparable chance to study in one of the best universities
of
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in
show examples
the world.
Therefore
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, their requirements are based on
competences
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competencies
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and skills gathered by extraordinary
students
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, that have earned themselves the merit of studying in
such
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institutions. The limited amount of opportunities
prompt
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prompts
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students
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not only from America
,
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apply
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but from around the world to go the extra mile in
try
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trying
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to meet
such
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criteria.
Moreover
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, selection processes are meant to outline reputable and admirable candidates, that would become important members of
society
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in the near future. Thoroughly selection process often signifies quality, and educated members of
society
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who have
traspassed
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trespassed
such
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elements in order to reach their goals
,
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apply
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would pour their whole mind, heart and dedication into transforming the
fabrics
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fabric
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of
society
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. A
well selected
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well-selected
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cohort, equals in most cases, a
well select
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well-select
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group of
oustanding
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outstanding
professionals. To illustrate, young graduates from reputable institutions
such
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as Oxford or Harvard, are usually positioned with a high regard in
society
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. Without
doubt
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a doubt
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, in the majority of cases are the ones that make
exel
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exceptions
in non-comparable advancements in
society
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. In conclusion, admissions processes may represent a barrier for many
students
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. Whatever the drawbacks
this
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could signify to certain people; the positive remark and development that
this
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kind of measure has
guarantees
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guaranteed
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a selection of cohorts of
an underscoring
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underscoring students
an underscoring student
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students
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, that will forge and become
high quality
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high-quality
show examples
professionals that would change and benefit in many ways, the
society
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of today.
Submitted by alejandragarciabaez.9 on

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Task Response
It's essential to directly address the question asked, discussing both the positives and negatives if required by the topic. While your focus on the positive aspects is clear, incorporating contrasting views or acknowledging potential drawbacks would provide a more balanced response.
Coherence and Cohesion
Structuring your essay with clear paragraphs, each beginning with a topic sentence that outlines the main idea of the paragraph, will improve clarity and coherence. Ensure that each paragraph clearly relates back to the central argument of the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Using a wider range of linking words and phrases can enhance the flow of your essay. While you’ve demonstrated good structure, varying your connective devices beyond 'Moreover', 'For example', and 'In conclusion' can improve readability and cohesion.
Task Achievement
Incorporating specific, detailed examples can strengthen your argument by providing evidence to support your claims. While general references to Ivy League universities are good, detailing specific programs, policies, or case studies could offer a more compelling argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic achievements
  • foster
  • culture of excellence
  • merit-based system
  • dedicated
  • educational institutions
  • quality education
  • future workforce
  • stress and pressure
  • fierce competition
  • mental health
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • burnout
  • tertiary education
  • less privileged backgrounds
  • exacerbate
  • social inequality
  • drives innovation
  • programs and facilities
  • overemphasis
  • creativity
  • critical thinking
  • ethical judgment
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