Children spend a lot of time watching TV and playing computer game, however it does not help in improving their mental abilities. Do you agree or disagree?

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Children can now more easily obtain
computer
games
and watch
TV
for longer periods of
time
than they could in the past. Parents are
also
preoccupied with completing and managing their employment. They
consequently
don't have enough
time
to spend with their
kids
.
Additionally
, parents will watch
TV
and play
games
with their
kids
.
As a result
,
kids
spend a lot of
time
wasting away on
this
digital entertainment. Does it have a detrimental impact on
kids
' mental development? I agree with
this
point of view. Playing
video
games
on the
computer
and watching
TV
, in my opinion, harms
kids
' brain development. First of all,
kids
who play
video
games
on
computers
and watch
TV
become less intelligent.
Computer
games
and
TV
shows offer a multitude of visuals and audio. Youngsters are deprived of the chance to dream and formulate their ideas. They are deprived of the chance to mature and think. It will have an impact on
kids
' mental capacities.
On the other hand
, reading and sketching help
kids
think and fantasize
while
also
developing many different brain regions.
Secondly
, youngsters who spend a lot of
time
playing
video
games
on
computers
and watching
TV
will interact with people less. Children who spend their days playing
video
games
on their
computers
and watching
TV
will not have the
time
or chance to play outside with other people.
Additionally
, exercise promotes brain development.
Consequently
, it is best to dissuade
kids
from using
computers
and watching
TV
. In summary, our bodies and minds require movement and thought. Both our bodies and thoughts will deteriorate if we stop them from moving.
Consequently
, rather
of
Change preposition
than
show examples
letting
kids
spend too much
time
on
TV
and playing
video
games
on the
computer
, we should encourage them to read and draw to develop their mental skills.
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Use of Examples
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Logical Structure
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Introduction & Conclusion
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Supported Main Points
Your main points are well supported, which helps in articulating your argument effectively.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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