Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many
individual
Change to a plural noun
individuals
show examples
argue that the loss of
particular
Correct article usage
a particular
show examples
gropu
Correct your spelling
group
of
plants
and
animals
today is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
major environmental issue.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
other
belives
Correct your spelling
believes
show examples
that there are more big environmental problems. In my opinion, people should
be prepare
Change the verb form
be prepared
show examples
for other environmental
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
rather than worrying about
loosing
Replace the word
losing
show examples
some living
beings
species. Extinction of living organisms can impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
natural balance. If the whole family of
animals
and
plants
dissapere
Correct your spelling
disappears
, it will create
imbalance
Add an article
an imbalance
show examples
in
Correct article usage
the echo-system
show examples
echo-system
Correct your spelling
ecosystem
show examples
as it
effect
Correct your spelling
affects
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
other living
beings
habitant and
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
mass extinction of the other
animals
and
plants
too.
For example
,
honey
bees are responsible for pollination, so that the
plants
can produce fruits and the
honey
made by
honey
bees is
source
Add an article
the source
a source
show examples
of food for other
animals
and human
beings
too. Once, the
honey
bees vanished
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
the earth whole living
organizm
Correct your spelling
organism
organisms
may
extint
Correct your spelling
exist
due to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of food.
Hence
, it is necessary to protect
endengerd
Correct your spelling
endangered
species so that there will be balance in nature and other organisms can survive too. Mankind should focus on
stoping
Correct your spelling
stopping
show examples
other disaster
Change the wording
another disaster
other disasters
show examples
in order to prevent mass
extiention
Correct your spelling
extinction
extension
extinctions
. There are major environmental disaster problems like
globle warmig
Correct your spelling
global warming
which impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
earth
Change noun form
earth's
show examples
temperature,
climate
Correct word choice
and climate
show examples
and
responsible
Add a missing verb
are responsible
show examples
for ozone layer
diplation
Correct your spelling
depletion
dilation
as it can vanish all living
beings
from the
planate
Correct your spelling
planet
show examples
.
It's
Correct your spelling
Its
show examples
process is slow and
unnotecible
Correct your spelling
unnoticeable
but it will show its result in
decyds
Correct your spelling
decades
deeds
even in
century
Add an article
a century
show examples
. For
intance
Correct your spelling
instance
, recent data
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
WHO(World Health Organization) carried out in 2023 provided that
due to
the
globle
Correct your spelling
global
warming impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
temparute
Correct your spelling
temperate
rises every
1 degree
Add a hyphen
1-degree
show examples
celcius
Correct your spelling
celsius
in 4 years which will become 60
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
show examples
celcius
Change the capitalization
Celcius
show examples
in 50 years, if the temperature rises to
50 degree
Add a hyphen
50-degree
show examples
celcius
Correct your spelling
celsius
, many
animals
and
plants
species will die out. To
couter
Correct your spelling
solve
this
problem planting
tree
Fix the agreement mistake
trees
show examples
and increasing forest area are essential
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
since
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
can protect
animals
,
plants
and human
beings
. In conclusion, every living
beings
Change to a singular noun
being
show examples
play
Wrong verb form
plays
show examples
vital
Add an article
a vital
show examples
role in nature and it is important to preserve all living
beings
. But there are other main environmental problems.
Individual
Fix the agreement mistake
Individuals
show examples
should make
Add an article
a strategy
the strategy
show examples
strategy
Fix the agreement mistake
strategies
show examples
to overcome
other major environmental issue
Change the wording
another major environmental issue
other major environmental issues
show examples
like
globle
Correct your spelling
global
warming
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
so that all living
organism
Fix the agreement mistake
organisms
show examples
can live.
Submitted by prashant.pun2076 on

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Task Achievement
Focus on improving the structure of your essay by providing a clear thesis statement in the introduction and summarizing your main points more effectively in the conclusion.
Coherence & Cohesion
To enhance coherence, work on your transitions between paragraphs and ensure each paragraph flows logically to the next. It will make your argument more cohesive and easier to follow.
Task Achievement
Enhance your task achievement by developing your examples further. Use specific, detailed examples to support your arguments. This clarity will strengthen your essay significantly.
Task Achievement
Consider revisiting the topic to ensure all aspects are covered comprehensively. While you’ve discussed both views, developing a clearer stance in your conclusion could improve task achievement.
Coherence & Cohesion
Be mindful of spelling and grammatical errors. Correcting these will improve readability and present a more polished essay.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
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