Nowadays a large amount of advertising is aimed at children. Some people think this can have negative effects on children and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There is no denying that in

this

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modern age,

children

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-oriented advertisements are proliferating, inevitably leading to harmful consequences for the generation that gets exposed to

this

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content in the view of some.

While

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this

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brings about some disadvantages, publishing a ban on these commercials is unnecessary, as parental surveillance and accountability can direct

children

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's cognitive thinking. Opponents of

this

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trend argue that advertising directed toward those in their formative years leads to severe consequences. In more detail, adolescents with excessive screen time with

this

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type of content can cause conflict and tension between them and their parents. If they wish to possess extravagant toys or phones, but the adults cannot afford these products, they have no choice but to defy their parents as their desire is deprived.

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that, if those who hold parental responsibility

fulfill

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fulfil

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children

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's expectations excessively,

this

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can be a fundamental of bad personal traits

such

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as jealousness and selfishness, which can adversely persist into

young

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younger

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generations' adulthood.

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, promotional campaigns that aim at

children

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have more than their fair share of disadvantages.

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, blaming these

children

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-directed commercials for

such

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detrimental effects cannot ensure equality since

this

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drives economic boosts and

instills

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instils

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moral knowledge throughout representative characters. In more detail, youngsters can learn from these imaginary friends who deliver positive messages, resulting in an individual with excellent well-being.

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, those responsible for

children

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's exposure to these campaigns should teach them logical thinking to make a proper purchase and avoid consuming promoting products

such

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as junk food and tobacco.

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that, teaching youngsters to differentiate between reality and marketing is integral, as being surrounded by the paradox of campaigns in

this

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age is inevitable. In conclusion,

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the promotion of products that are aimed at

children

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can pose a threat to the relationship between them and their parents, implementing a prohibition plan cannot contribute to hindering

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progress, but parental accountability to monitor what

children

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watch and instructing to distinguish is way more essential.

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task achievement

To improve your task achievement, ensure a complete and balanced response to the question. Expand on how advertisements aimed at children can be seen in a positive light as well, balancing the argument further. Providing clearer, more varied, and specific examples would greatly enhance your argument.

coherence cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, organize your ideas more logically, making sure each paragraph flows smoothly to the next with appropriate linking words. Introducing a wider range of cohesive devices could help to improve the readability and flow of your essay. Ensuring that each main point is clearly supported with specific examples or explanations will also add to the cohesion of your writing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

326 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Targeted advertising
Psychological development
Artificial needs
Unhealthy eating habits
Materialism
Consumerism
Parental responsibility
Critical thinking
Informative content
Economic implications
Revenue generation
Content creation

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Nowadays a large amount of advertising is aimed at children. Some people think this can have negative effects on children and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

School should not force students who do not have natural ability for learning foreign language to study other language at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Nowadays, food has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live?

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the word. Do you think this is a positive or negative development

in today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantage of owwning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantage?

Some businesses find that their new employees lack basic interpersonal skills such as cooperative attitude. What are the reasons and suggest some possible solutions?