Many young people today know more about international pop and movie stars than famous people in the history in their country. Why is this? What can be done to increase young people's interest in famous people in the history of their country?

Nowadays, youngsters tend to show more interest in international celebrities than in historical figures in their nation.
This
essay,
therefore
, aims to present why
this
trend is rampant and what measures can be adopted to increase the youth’s interest in historical personalities. There are several reasons why the young nowadays are more familiar with foreign superstars than local ones from their country’s
history
.
Firstly
, social
media
is to blame. With the advent of social networking applications
such
as Facebook, Instagram, and WeChat, it is common that famous people’s lives are everywhere, grabbing young people’s attention. Many teenagers mostly spend their time surfing the Internet, looking at posts or articles about international pop idols, their vacations, their wardrobes, etc.
Secondly
, most youngsters deem
history
as boring.
History
is tedious to learn because they are required to read long stories and memorize heroes’ names, so even their teachers fail to make
history
lessons interesting. Thankfully, a multitude of solutions can be applied to maintain the young populace’s interest in historical people. Mainly, the filmmakers, especially local ones, should produce more movies based on key historical events or national heroes. By doing so, the young people will draw attention to
history
, especially when the actors portraying the heroes or reenacting the historical events in the movies are their idols.
In addition
, it is about time for schools to restructure their curriculum.
History
teaching should be tailored
according to
students’ interests. Rote learning,
that is
, memorizing long lists of heroes’ names or dates of events, must be discouraged. Alternatively, teachers should use modern
media
to create more appealing
history
lessons. In conclusion,
although
youngsters rarely pay attention to historical personalities
due to
social
media
and dull
history
subjects,
this
can be dealt with through concerted efforts from the
media
and schools.
Submitted by xiaoruoling7 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which demonstrates an understanding of the essay structure. However, more attention to the logical flow between paragraphs could strengthen coherence.
coherence cohesion
The main points are supported, but could be enhanced by incorporating a wider range of specific examples and pertinent details to vividly illustrate the arguments.
task achievement
You have addressed the task and provided clear ideas related to the prompt. Nonetheless, strive to create a more complete response with diverse and intricate ideas that thoroughly explore all parts of the task.
task achievement
While relevant examples are present, they could be more specific and detailed. This would serve to better demonstrate the points made and provide a more in-depth analysis of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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