IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that the internet has made books and libraries obsolete. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Provide reason and support with examples.

#people #internet #books #libraries #reason #support
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It is a common view that reading
books
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 and going to the
library
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 to explore
books
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 on various topics have now been replaced by the
Internet
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.
This
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 essay will agree that the
internet
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 is the primary reason to make
books
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 and libraries obsolete. Easily accessible
books
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, numerous reading materials on different topics and the availability of various leisure activities on the
Internet
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 have completely eradicated the need for going to a
library
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. The
Internet
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 is a vast pool of information, where almost all kinds of
books
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 are available on each topic, and they can be read anytime just within seconds. Not only that, various new research studies, articles on different topics, study
books
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, and newspapers, all can be accessed through the
internet
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 from anywhere. Because of these advantages of the
Internet
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, people prefer not to go to the
library
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 because they need to spend a lot of
time
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 and effort finding what they are looking for.
Moreover
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, sometimes they have to wait for a few weeks to get the book they need. Before the advent of the
internet
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, spending
time
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 in the
library
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 reading
books
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 was considered a leisure activity.
However
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, many youngsters, nowadays, spend their free
time
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 playing games, browsing through social media and talking with their friends on the
Internet
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.
For example
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, as per the study conducted by the Harvard Research Center, youngsters spend three hours daily on social media and playing online games.
To sum up
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, many people prefer reading
books
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 or news articles on the
internet
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 as it is very convenient to get any book or news articles on the
internet
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.
Furthermore
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, the
Internet
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 has completely changed people’s habits when it comes to utilizing their free
time
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. Most people spend their free
time
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 on social media or playing games
instead
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 of going to the
library
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.
Submitted by aayushvsanghvi8 on

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General advice on structure
Be sure to maintain a clear structure in your essay. Include an introduction, body paragraphs each focused on a single main idea, and a conclusion to tie your arguments together.
Developing and supporting arguments
When discussing examples or supporting points, try to include specific details and data to strengthen your argument. This could involve citing studies, statistics, or concrete examples from credible sources.
Improving task response
Though you've addressed the task well, aiming for a more nuanced argument that considers both sides of the issue may enrich your essay and provide a more comprehensive view on the topic.
Enhancing coherence and cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs to make your essay more coherent. This can be achieved through the use of linking phrases and making sure each paragraph flows logically to the next.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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