International travel is becoming cheaper and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourist. Do the advantages of increased tourists outweigh disadvantages.
Recently, several nations have taken the opportunity to decrease the cost of going abroad to bring more tourists into their territories. I believe they can enhance the economy through
this
practice, and Linking Words
this
advantage far outweighs any potential disadvantages.
One drawback of increased tourism is the risk of environmental issues. Linking Words
In other words
, the expansion of vacation places will decline natural resources and drive up waste from the industry. Linking Words
For instance
, since Bali began receiving foreign guests a few decades ago, its farmland has decreased by 400%, Linking Words
while
the amount of trash produced by the entertainment industry has increased by 300%. Linking Words
However
, I think it can be minimized if the government conserves green areas and implements adequate waste management.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, the potential benefit of the strategy is that it can boost the financial sector. Linking Words
This
is Linking Words
due to
the fact that these tourists will spend their money on local markets and hotels, leading to a growth in money transactions in the region. Linking Words
For example
, Thailand has presented its tourism products at international events and meetings and provided the simplicity of visa applications for foreigners. Linking Words
As a result
, a number of overseas citizens come to the country for holidays, honeymoons, and business gatherings, causing them to spend their cash on local hotels, restaurants, and supermarkets. Linking Words
Consequently
, these behaviours have contributed to Thailand's annual income growth of 200% in a five-year period, which is unlikely to happen if the authorities do not open their homeland to foreigners. I think Linking Words
this
can greatly benefit them since the funds can be used to improve public facilities Linking Words
such
as hospitals and schools.
In conclusion, given that a rising number of overseas travellers visiting countries would result in environmental problems, I believe Linking Words
this
downside is far outweighed by the upside that it can grant more funding for the regions to build accessible public amenities, particularly health clinics and novel institutions.Linking Words
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Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, make sure to clearly address all parts of the prompt in your introduction and throughout your essay. An explicit statement in the introduction about how the advantages outweigh the disadvantages will strengthen your position.
Coherence & Cohesion
Include more varied sentence structures and transitions to guide the reader through your argument more smoothly. This will enhance the flow and coherence of your essay.
Task Achievement
Though you provided examples, integrating a wider range of evidence and data could make your arguments more persuasive. This includes statistics, studies, or more diverse scenarios.
Coherence & Cohesion
To further improve coherence, ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within the paragraph support that idea. Avoid deviating from the main topic of each paragraph.