Nowadays, more people move away from their friends and families for work. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?

#people #move #friends #families #work #development

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Nowadays, individuals are now willing and able to work far from their birthplaces.

This

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is a great opportunity for them

as well as

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for their families. In

this

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essay, the pros and cons will be discussed.

However

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, I believe the

advantages

Use synonyms

are greater than the

advantages

Use synonyms

. First of all, migrating abroad is no longer a big deal. The main reason why people tend to move away from their home town is

due to

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the financial and career

opportunity

Fix the agreement mistake

opportunities

show examples

Although

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there is a possibility of getting away from their families and coming home often. They can now provide financial support to them. Paying hospital bills, tuition fees for their younger siblings and food is no longer a problem.

For example

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, your salary in your home town is not enough for one month's consumption.

Moreover

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, with regard to their friends. It cannot be denied that working away makes one friendship end and

faded

Wrong verb form

fade

show examples

However

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, I believe that strong bonding is not easy to break even though you are separated.

Lastly

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, other

advantages

Use synonyms

are high

salary

Fix the agreement mistake

salaries

show examples

and the availability of more jobs. Professional growth is easy to achieve. Getting a higher salary will give satisfaction and saving for the future.

Furthermore

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this

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also

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an opportunity to acquire new skills that we can use to help their province if she/he

decided

Wrong verb form

decides

show examples

to go back for good.

For example

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, being an accountant, I can start my own accounting firm that will help those businesses in filing their VAT and income tax. In conclusion, I would like to say that, the

advantages

Use synonyms

of it outweigh the disadvantages. In

this

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generation, we need to be practical to be successful even though the meaning of

this

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is you need to move away.

Submitted by jbcornejo on Sat Aug 13 2022

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task achievement

Ensure that you address all parts of the task more comprehensively; discussing both sides of the argument in more detail will strengthen your response.

coherence cohesion

Include more varied sentence structures and avoid repetition to enhance clarity and readability.

coherence cohesion

Introduction and conclusion are clear and well-structured, providing a solid framework for the essay.

task achievement

Examples provided are relevant and help clarify the points being made.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

285 words

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Nowadays, more people move away from their friends and families for work. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say cultural traditions are destroyed when they are used as money- making attractions aimed at tourists. Others say this is the only way to save such traditions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that large companies should provide sports and social facilities for local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Some people argue that teaching children of different abilities together benefits all of them. Others believe that intelligent children should be taught separately and given special treatment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.