Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people's lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
While
teenagehood is considered to be more joyful and carefree, some people are of the opinion that adulthood is the happiest Linking Words
time
. In my opinion, as teenagers have more free Use synonyms
time
and no pressure of responsibilities, they should be those who enjoy their lives the most. Use synonyms
This
essay aims to discuss both views.
On the one hand, adults have a chance to experience a sense of maturity and independence. Since grown-ups have full freedom in life, they are empowered to do whatever comes to their mind without being bothered If they are allowed to do that by their parents. Linking Words
For instance
, in our country teens are not permitted to be outside after 11 p.m., Linking Words
however
, adults can forget about Linking Words
this
kind of concern. Linking Words
Additionally
, a mature person has more opportunities in life compared to minors. To illustrate, many dangerous activities Linking Words
such
as rock climbing and paragliding are strongly prohibited for adolescents.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, teenagers have a great deal of Linking Words
time
to hang out with friends which grown people don’t. Use synonyms
In other words
, youngsters tend to socialize every day at school, clubs, and parks, Linking Words
while
their parents are at work with no decent Linking Words
time
to even talk to colleagues. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, minors do not face any pressure because of urgent and important duties, which can Linking Words
further
lead to stress and anxiety. Linking Words
For example
, preteens currently spend their days playing games or watching TV because they don’t have work to accomplish as their parents do.
In conclusion, despite having fewer opportunities and freedom, teenagers are living their best period of life.Linking Words
Submitted by naira.gumar on
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coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing the structure of your essay by ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea, followed by supporting sentences with examples, and a concluding sentence that summarizes the paragraph's main idea or provides a transitional phrase to the next paragraph.
coherence cohesion
To improve the introduction and conclusion, ensure your thesis statement in the introduction clearly presents your stance on the issue. In the conclusion, restate this stance and summarize the main points discussed, ensuring it reflects the overall argument presented in the essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each main point is supported by specific examples or evidence. Avoid general statements or assumptions without backing them up with concrete details. This will strengthen your argument and make your essay more persuasive.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task by discussing both views and providing your own opinion clearly throughout the essay, not just in the conclusion. This will ensure a more balanced and comprehensive response to the question.
task achievement
Your ideas are relevant, but you could make them more comprehensive by exploring them in greater depth. For instance, discuss the implications of your points or how they relate to the wider context or different perspectives. This depth of analysis will make your essay more insightful.
task achievement
Incorporate more varied and specific examples to support your arguments. This could include personal anecdotes, factual information, statistics, or hypothetical scenarios. Specific examples make your points more convincing and relatable.