In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
A lot of countries are witnessing that the
people
who live in Correct article usage
the countrysides
countrysides
are emigrating to Fix the agreement mistake
countryside
cities
, hence
the population of Correct article usage
the countrysides
countrysides
is reducing. I believe that Fix the agreement mistake
countryside
this
is a negative phenomenon, and I will inspect that in this
essay.
Due to
that the Individuals in rural areas are travelling to urban spots, the
population of Correct word choice
and the
cities
are growing day by day, which leads to some drawbacks for cities
. For example
, the congestion of
Change preposition
in
cities
is growing and that leads to pollution. Since,
more Remove the comma
apply
people
are living in cities
, they use more vehicles, more
fossil fuels are burned which plays a crucial role in increasing air pollution. Correct word choice
and more
Also
, people
are to be tackled more with traffic jams. All of them are going to make
a lot of chaos.
Verb problem
cause
Furthermore
, as there are less
Change the quantifier
fewer
people
in Correct article usage
the countrysides
countrysides
, the number of individuals who pursue agriculture will decrease, which has many consequences. the most important thing in Fix the agreement mistake
countryside
people
's lives is food, and countries need labours
Correct your spelling
labourers
for maintaining
the Change preposition
to maintain
agriculture
lands Replace the word
agricultural
and
without Correct word choice
apply
a
surveillance Remove the article
apply
to
the lands, they are going to become infertile which leads to food scarcity. Change preposition
of
While
,
nowadays more Remove the comma
apply
people
especially youngsters prefer to leave rural life and do
not work on Unnecessary verb
apply
land
, Add an article
the land
Instead
they choose to work in cities
.
In conclusion, people
are choosing to live in city spots as opposed to stay
in Change the verb form
staying
Correct article usage
the countrysides
countrysides
, albeit Fix the agreement mistake
countryside
this
is followed by some disadvantages, such
as a dramatic increase in city dwellers than
cause congestion and pollution in Correct word choice
that
cities
, and also
the decrease in farmers that leads to food scarcity.Submitted by sindokhtdadjoo2000 on
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Task Achievement
Ensure your introduction fully paraphrases the question and clearly states your position. This essay would benefit from a more explicit statement of your viewpoint in the introduction.
Task Achievement
To enrich your argument, use a wider range of specific examples. While you have presented reasons for the negative impact of urban migration, incorporating specific research findings, statistics, or case studies could make your argument more compelling.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on the logical flow between ideas. Consider using more cohesive devices and varied sentence structures to connect your ideas more smoothly.
Coherence and Cohesion
A brief summary of your argument in the conclusion increases its impact. Reinforce your stance with a compelling final statement that echoes the main points discussed.
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