IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

University students should pay the full cost of their studies because a university education benefits individuals rather than society as a whole. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#university #students #cost #studies #education #individuals #society
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It is argued that college
students
 should
paid
Change the verb form
pay
be paid
show examples
 all of the cost of learning because the benefits things that affect
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
individuals outweigh society. In
this
 essay, I will discuss why
this
view
Replace the word
viewpoint
show examples
 point flawed and give examples to improve my opinions.
Firstly
,
tuitions
Change the noun form
tuition
show examples
fees
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 one of the huge things that
defense
Change the spelling
defence
show examples
students
 have chances to attend their
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
 universities because the total
fees
, which are spent for studying a course account
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 numerous budgets.
Therefore
, it is a drawback for society
when
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 currently
lack
Correct subject-verb agreement
lacks
show examples
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
high-qualityc
Correct your spelling
high-quality
 employees
such
 as engineers, medical employees and scientists.
For instance
, there was a result of a survey show about 50
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
students
 had to select low-cost majors
instead
 of
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
 majors.
Overall
,
tuitions
Change the noun form
tuition
show examples
fees
 will affect to quality of talented
students
 who lack of financial budget to follow courses.
On the other hand
,
this
 problem
also
 has a
differant
Correct your spelling
different
 drawback when all course
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the college is
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
 charged,
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
the universities will have not enough
finance
Fix the agreement mistake
finances
show examples
for hiring
Change preposition
to hire
show examples
 people who
own
Verb problem
have
show examples
 high levels of
professional
Replace the word
professionalism
show examples
.
Therefore
, it
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
of damaged
Change preposition
damage
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the quality of
students
 when not served by them.
By contrast
, low-salary teachers
also
 reduce levels of concentration when
teach
Change the verb form
teaching
show examples
students
, because they can attend other works for
living
Add an article
a living
the living
show examples
. As
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 result, course
fees
also
 is a method that
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
 increase
high
Add an article
the high
show examples
 standard of studying.
For instance
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Cambridge
university
Capitalize word
University
show examples
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 have high
tuitions
Change the noun form
tuition
show examples
fees
 but
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
still keep
position
Correct pronoun usage
its position
show examples
 is one of the best
unversities
Correct your spelling
universities
 all over the world. In conclusion, the cost of university despite one of the problems for
attract
Change the form of the verb
attracting
show examples
 the attention of
talent
Replace the word
talented
show examples
 people but it
also
 is a mount of budget for hiring high-quality researchers and scientists to increase valuable courses. In my opinion, universities should not only consider tuition costs to suit the majority of
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 but
also
remain
Verb problem
maintain
show examples
 the quality of courses.
Submitted by hoaan2409 on

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Task Achievement
To improve your task achievement, ensure that your essay fully addresses the prompt by presenting a clear position throughout the response. Develop your ideas comprehensively and support them with relevant, specific examples. Consider both sides of the argument effectively if the question requires a discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance the logical structure of your essay by organizing your ideas more clearly into paragraphs, each with a single main idea. Use linking words to show the relationship between ideas and paragraphs. Ensure each paragraph flows logically from one to the next.
Coherence and Cohesion
Pay attention to your introduction and conclusion. The introduction should clearly present your thesis statement and outline your main points. The conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your position without introducing new information.
Language Proficiency
Revise your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve word choice. Aim for a range of vocabulary and sentence structures that accurately convey your ideas. Proofreading your essay can help identify and correct errors before submission.
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