Many working people get little or not exercise during the work day, and have health problems as a result. Why do so many people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
A large part of society is not participating in sports
activities
, consequently
, they are facing health issues. This
can be due to
the busy work
schedule of people
nowadays and a possible solution is to encourage them to set some time
apart in their after-hours
in order to engage in these activities
.
The small number of individuals who work
out can be a result of the fact that they spend most of their time
at work
. Exercising is an activity that demands a high level of energy. however
, most people
will feel tired after sitting on a chair for 8 hours
and need to rest at home and spend time
with their families or do some fun activities
with their friends and acquaintances, so little time
would be left for exercise. According to
a recent study , the number of hours
people
spent at work
was inversely proportional to the time
they spent at the gym.
A possible answer to this
problem is to allocate the weekend and leisure time
to activities
that involve some movement in our bodies. One way to do that is
to start walking to places that are not so far away from us instead
of driving a car or using public transportation . Another one is to not go to cafes and restaurants which make us remain at
the same place for Change preposition
in
hours
and instead
, engage in activities
that are not only interesting but also
increase our blood pressure, such
as jogging, walking or even climbing a mountain. This
can look mundane or dull at first,
but we can think of innovative ways to make it more exciting for ourselves, such
as walking through the aquarium, and nature or exploring different parts of the city on foot. For instance
, the rate of obesity has been reported to be significantly lower in countries where people
use walking as the main means of transportation.
In conclusion, the fact that people
rarely exercise can be impacted by long working hours
and one answer to this
obstacle is to make sure we spend adequate time
doing activities
that make us move our bodies.Submitted by faragtaj6 on
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Introduction and Conclusion
Enhance the introduction and conclusion by summarizing the main points more clearly and directly addressing the question. This will make your argument more impactful.
Task Achievement
Develop your ideas more thoroughly by expanding on how busy work schedules specifically prevent physical activity and propose more detailed solutions for incorporating exercise into daily routines.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use a wider variety of linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your essay. This will help in making the overall structure and progression of ideas more cohesive.
Task Achievement and Coherence
Include a mix of general statements and personal examples to support your arguments. Personal examples make your essay more relatable and compelling.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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