One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages.
Nowadays,
life
expectancy has dramatically increased Use synonyms
due to
an overwhelming improvement in medical care. It is argued that the main advantage of Linking Words
this
phenomenon is that Linking Words
society
may benefit from the knowledge of those seniors whilst the disadvantage is the fact that they may represent a burden for Use synonyms
society
.
It is conspicuous that improving Use synonyms
life
expectancy is positive for our modern economy Use synonyms
as well as
for our development. Indeed, workers, thanks to the noticeable scientific progress Linking Words
that is
witnessed in the healthcare sector, are able to work longer. Whilst the conventional retirement age had been about 60 years old some decades ago , it became 65 years old in the majority of European nations.In Linking Words
this
regard experienced people, who became skilful through their whole careers, represent a priceless help for companies in numerous sectors.Linking Words
For example
, the best doctors are the elder consultants because they enhance their knowledge through their extended working Linking Words
life
.
Use synonyms
However
, living longer features Linking Words
also
inconveniences.It is crystal clear that extremely old citizens tend to become ill and unable to accomplish simple tasks.They might be gifted, they are just unqualified to work though.In Linking Words
this
regard, some argue that those people are nothing more than a burden for Linking Words
society
and for their families. In fact, they involve high expenditures to deal with their diseases, especially when they don't have a consistent income or reliable insurance. In many countries , Use synonyms
for example
, a wide range portion of seniors didn't have a pension after their retirement and became Linking Words
dependants
Replace the word
dependent
of
their families.
In conclusion, the surge in Change preposition
on
life
expectancy is a beneficial phenomenon for our Use synonyms
society
because it allows old people to work more and to strengthen our economy. Even though, those may represent a heavy burden for their families. In my viewpoint, our grandparents, no matter the money we should spend to live with them, remain priceless.Use synonyms
Submitted by namoisma on
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task achievement
Consider providing more detailed examples or evidence to further strengthen the points about both the advantages and disadvantages of increased life expectancy. This will enhance the reader’s understanding of your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the coherence by using more linking words and phrases to signal different parts of your argument, this will make the essay flow more naturally.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced view, considering both advantages and disadvantages of increased life expectancy, which demonstrates a comprehensive response to the task.
task achievement
Your use of real-world examples, such as the higher retirement age in Europe and the role of experienced doctors, effectively illustrates your points.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in organising your ideas well.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?