The graph below shows the percentage of households with different kinds of technology in the US from 1995 to 1999. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparions where relevant.

The graph below shows the percentage of households with different kinds of technology in the US from 1995 to 1999. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparions where relevant.
The line graph presents the
precentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
of various equipment used by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
families in the United States of America between 1995 and 1999.
Overall
, throughout the given
period
washing
machine
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machines
show examples
still held
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
position as the most owned technology in
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
States of America. The quantity of phone users skyrocketed
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the over years and became the second most used technology surpassing
computer
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computers
show examples
,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
, and DVD
player
Fix the agreement mistake
players
show examples
. The number of Washing machine
owner
Fix the agreement mistake
owners
show examples
experienced a drastic increase in the 1995 to 1996
period
, from 60 per cent
until
Change preposition
to
show examples
70 per cent. Since
then
, the figure hovered and peaked at 80
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
in 1999. The gradual increase over years trend followed by the quantity of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
computer users
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
started
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
only 40
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
in the first
year
, it managed to
reached
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reach
show examples
the number of 60
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
the end of the shown
period
. Another technology that
shown
Wrong verb form
shows
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
stable growth during the
period
is
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
. Starting at the lowest point in the first
year
, the number of internet users gradually increased and peaked
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
50
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
in the
last
year
. The
precentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
of the phone owner quantity
shown
Wrong verb form
showed
show examples
a stable growth until 1996 at 20
percent
.
However
, after that particular
year
, it increased drastically and peaked at the
precentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
of around 70
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
in 1996.
In contrast
to the DVD play which was the only
technlogy
Correct your spelling
technology
experienced
Correct pronoun usage
that experienced
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
downfall in 1996.
Submitted by writingieltsband9 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Replace the words period, percent, year with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "gradual" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • adoption rates
  • technological proliferation
  • year-on-year growth
  • digital divide
  • saturation point
  • laggard technology
  • consumer electronics
  • technological obsolescence
  • internet penetration
  • market dynamics
  • socioeconomic factors
  • innovation trajectory
  • connectivity infrastructure
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