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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

More and more couples are deciding to be child-free, to have no children, in other words. Some people claim that those couples reach this conclusion through entirely selfish reasons. While others think that they came to this decision through noble motives, such as concern about overpopulation and desire for independence Disuss both views and give your opinion.

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These days, an increasing number of married
couples
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 prefer to be “child-free” or
in other words
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, not to have
children
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. Some people argue that selfishness is the underlying reason;
while
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 others believe they have certain noble motives
such
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 as considering overpopulation and willingness to be independent. Through
this
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 essay, I will ventilate both views by providing some examples,
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then
Correct word choice
and then
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 giving my own supportive opinion.
To begin
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 with, being child-free is perceived to be a
self-centered
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self-centred
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 yet tempting choice for some
couples
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 since they can focus on their existing lives only,
instead
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 of being distracted by confusion about other affairs
such
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 as
children
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's needs.
This
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 idea is rational since basic life necessities including meals,
clothings
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clothing
items of clothing
articles of clothing
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, and education are inevitably getting more expensive nowadays;
consequently
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, family finances tend to be heavily burdened in order to
fulfill
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fulfil
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 those. Neglecting
this
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, today's world is so familiar with unwanted cases whereby
couples
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 are found living unhappily, stealing
in
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apply
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groceries and even suicide
due to
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 the stress of maintaining their financial needs, particularly for their
children
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. Contrary to the previous view,
couples
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 who intend to be living without any
children
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 are caused by their certain perspective of the world nowadays
that is
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 getting more crowded and even it is projected there will be no space to live in for the upcoming years.
Existing
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The existing
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 condition of human beings is heart-wrenching. As can be seen, there are a lot of
children
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 experiencing starvation and being uneducated
due to
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 poverty, wars, and injustice. If
couples
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 decide to continue emanating a new human population, rather than solving the existing problems, in reverse, it will create new ones.
Subsequently
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, when it continues, life independence will
also
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 be robbed of whether the
children
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 or the parents. Regarding child-free,
to sum up
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,
this
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endeavor
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endeavour
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 is
underlied
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underlined
 by a wide range of motives. In spite of that, I personally perceive the current world conditions are no longer promising for
children
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's lives and overpopulation should not be left unchecked.
Hence
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, I am on the receptive side toward child-free since it can be one of the convincing alternatives.

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task achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly outlines the views you will discuss. Consider integrating a thesis statement that glimpses your opinion to engage the reader further.
task achievement
To improve the task response, aim to provide distinct, real-life examples that support each view you discuss. General statements are useful, but specific instances or statistics can significantly enhance your argument's credibility.
coherence cohesion
Enhance cohesion and coherence by linking ideas more smoothly between paragraphs. Utilizing a wider range of transitional phrases can help bridge sections and present a more cohesive argument.
coherence cohesion
For strengthened main points, integrate a more balanced discussion that critically engages with both views before presenting your own. This ensures the reader is guided through a thorough exploration of the topic.
coherence cohesion
While your conclusion succinctly wraps up your essay, endeavor to revisit the key points briefly. This will reinforce your argument and make a stronger final impression.
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