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Band 6

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

#museums #charge #admission #people
In
this
 day and age, some argue that admission tickets to
museums
 should be charged for visitors, though some remain free. In my opinion, the permission of entrance fees can be beneficial and the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
This
 essay will examine the pros and cons of charging an entrance fee for
museums
. The most important one to consider is that the charging fees for admission to
museums
 could be the cost of maintenance. Even though the place represents historical buildings, they have to hire a security guard to protect them from any criminal situations
such
 as a thief.
Due to
 the fact that the value of the show of ancient objects could not be evaluated by price, the custody of antique materials would be considered by hiring security guards.
On the other hand
, a
further
 disadvantage note is the preservation of museum exhibitions should be provided by the government. They might be the financial support to maintain the history of being a treasured country.
However
, the charged fee totally gains income, which is less stable than supported funding from the government because if there are fewer people who come to visit, it will result in a loss of income unexpectedly. In conclusion, I strongly believe that there are positive aspects that outweigh the negative aspects of getting admission fees from the customers. As a suggestion, paying a fee properly maintains the
museums
, especially various antique objects that motivate more and more people to demand to visit.
Submitted by sasinipapj on

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Task Achievement
Ensure that your essay directly addresses the question asked, providing a clear opinion on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Your conclusion should distinctly reflect this stance, ensuring that readers understand your viewpoint.
Task Achievement
Include more specific examples to support your main points. For instance, you could mention a particular museum that successfully uses admission fees to enhance exhibits or provide better services, to make your arguments more persuasive.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your essay in clear paragraphs, each representing a distinct idea or argument. Introduce each paragraph with a topic sentence that encapsulates the main idea, followed by explanations and examples. This structure will enhance the logical flow and coherence of your writing.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve cohesion, make better use of linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. This not only aids the reader in understanding the relationship between your points but also helps in creating a more polished and professional piece of writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Admission fee
  • Revenue stream
  • Maintenance
  • Overcrowding
  • Commercialization
  • Cultural heritage
  • Diverse attendance
  • Community ownership
  • Access to culture
  • Visitor experience
  • Exhibit quality
  • Cultural mission
  • Reliance on funding
  • Government subsidies
  • Cultural accessibility
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