Some people believe that it is good to share as much as information as possible in scientific research, business and academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In the digital age, the debate between unrestricted
information
sharing and the need to protect sensitive
data
is increasingly relevant.
While
some people believe that sharing
information
offers many benefits, I tend to agree with the careful protection of valuable
information
. The proponents of open
information
sharing highlight its role in fostering
innovation
and collaboration. They argue that
access
to a wide array of
data
accelerates research, democratizes knowledge, and potentially reduces costs.
For example
, in academia, the necessity to
access
multiple paid resources for a
single term
Add a hyphen
single-term
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paper underscores the limitations and financial burdens of restricted
information
access
. Open sharing is posited to not only facilitate more inclusive research but
also
to significantly improve efficiency and productivity across various sectors.
However
, I would argue that it is more important to protect sensitive
information
. Unrestricted
access
could lead to dire consequences,
such
as security breaches that compromise personal and national safety, intellectual property theft that stunts
innovation
, and even endanger national security.
For instance
, the leakage of military technology to hostile entities could drastically undermine a nation's
defense
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defence
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capabilities.
Furthermore
, the theft of proprietary research from a pharmaceutical company could halt the development of life-saving drugs. Protecting sensitive
data
is crucial not just for safeguarding competitive edges or proprietary technologies but
also
for preserving the very foundation of
innovation
and creativity. In conclusion,
while
the sharing of
information
is crucial for advancement, a judicious approach to the protection of sensitive and valuable
data
is imperative.
This
ensures a harmonious balance between
innovation
and security.
Submitted by fiasngs on

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coherence cohesion
To improve your score, consider incorporating a wider range of linking phrases to enhance the cohesiveness of your arguments. You've effectively structured your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, but a more diverse use of connectors will strengthen the flow between ideas.
task achievement
Your response to the task shows a good understanding, yet it would benefit from more explicit references to the question prompt. Consider directly addressing both views before providing your own opinion to ensure a more comprehensive discussion.
task achievement
Your essay can be more convincing with additional specific examples or case studies. While you've mentioned general scenarios, citing real-life examples or research findings will add credibility and depth to your arguments, thereby enriching your response to the task.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
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