1. Festivals Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In contemporary society, there is
growing
Correct article usage
a growing
show examples
sentiment that the true meaning behind traditional or religious
festivals
has been overshadowed by a desire for enjoyment and entertainment.
This
essay strongly disagrees with that statement because these celebrations still hold significance as expressions of cultural heritage and community values.
To begin
with, traditional
festivals
still retain value as a declaration of cultural identity and community cohesion. They serve as occasions for people to come together, reaffirm shared values, and strengthen social bonds.
Moreover
, even in modern interpretations, elements of tradition and symbolism often persist, serving to connect participants to their cultural heritage and collective memory.
For example
, many immigrants from India have brought Diwali into Canada,
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
or the USA, and have taught their children to do it in order to keep the memory
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
their homeland and religion even in new countries with different backgrounds.
Additionally
, for many individuals and communities, religious
festivals
continue to hold deep meaning and importance. These
festivals
serve as opportunities for spiritual reflection, communal worship, and ethical renewal. They provide a sense of connectivity of people with their faith, fostering a sense of belonging and purpose.
For example
,on
Christmas
Add a comma
Christmas,
show examples
many engage in religious rituals
such
as attending church services or participating in nativity plays.
To conclude
,
while
it is true that contemporary celebrations might prioritize enjoyment and entertainment, that does not necessarily negate their cultural or religious significance.
Submitted by natallia.khrenava on

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Coherence & Cohesion
To improve the logical structure, ensure your paragraphs consistently follow a clear topic sentence, supporting sentences and conclusion. This helps in making your argument more convincing and easier to follow.
Coherence & Cohesion
Include both an introduction and a conclusion. Your introduction should clearly state your stance on the prompt, while your conclusion should succinctly summarize your argument and restate your position.
Coherence & Cohesion
To further support your main points, incorporate a variety of examples, data, or quotations that are directly relevant to your argument. This strengthens your essay by providing concrete evidence to back up your claims.
Task Achievement
Ensure you fully address the task by covering all aspects of the prompt. This includes discussing the extent to which you agree or disagree with the given opinion and explaining your reasoning with clear, comprehensive ideas.
Task Achievement
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Task Achievement
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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • commercialization
  • globalization
  • cultural heritage
  • religious significance
  • community bonding
  • entertainment and leisure aspects
  • diluted understanding
  • traditional meanings
  • implications
  • perceived shift
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