IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In many countries the conception of fast food as increased dramatically in recent years what is cost this increase what affect might it have on individuals and Society

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The world has seen many advancements throughout history, from stone wheels to high-speed rubber wheels, and from pigeons carrying messages to real-time video communication. Though technology has brought many positive changes, it has
also
Linking Words
 affected our way of living. In earlier days,
people
Use synonyms
 hunted,
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
 they started farming and cultivating
food
Use synonyms
, which required a lot of effort and time. As technology advanced, packaged
food
Use synonyms
 came into existence, allowing
people
Use synonyms
 to eat without making preparations. As lifestyles became busier,
people
Use synonyms
 preferred fast
food
Use synonyms
, which saves time and is convenient. Fast
food
Use synonyms
, as the name suggests, is easier and faster to prepare than normal
food
Use synonyms
. It became a regular part of our lives
due to
Linking Words
 its appetizing looks and availability. Today, it is an alarming situation in many countries as fast
food
Use synonyms
 has become the primary diet for some
people
Use synonyms
. Fast
food
Use synonyms
 is not very healthy as it lacks the essential nutrients needed for long-term survival. We should imagine the nutrition-deficient body of someone who only eats fast
food
Use synonyms
. During the COVID pandemic, packaged
food
Use synonyms
 was readily available, and it became a daily part of my life. I couldn't get enough of the taste and kept having it until I developed health issues. The main issue,
according to
Linking Words
 me, is the popularity of fast
food
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
 its availability and the fancy designs of the outlets that serve them. The most harmful impact is on the younger generation, who are highly exposed to them. The entire society is affected
due to
Linking Words
 the lack of health and energy to do anything productive. Fast
food
Use synonyms
 tends to
install
Correct your spelling
instil
show examples
 a sense of laziness in our lifestyle, hampering growth.
To conclude
Linking Words
, fast
food
Use synonyms
 has the power to destroy our culture, lifestyle, and standards of healthy living.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea or point for better coherence and cohesion. It is advisable to have clear topic sentences at the start of each paragraph.
task achievement
Provide more detailed, specific examples to fully support your claims. This will enhance the task response.
introduction conclusion present
The essay provides a thoughtful introduction to the topic, setting the scene for the discussion of fast food's rise.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the author's stance, reinforcing the main argument.
complete response
Throughout the essay, there is a clear and comprehensive response to the task question, discussing both causes and effects of increased fast food consumption.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: