IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In many countries, people increasingly talk about money such as how much they earn or how much they pay for things in their daily conversations. Why is this happening? Is it a positive or negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In today's fast-paced world, monetary problems
such
Linking Words
 as individual income and expenses are hotly debated in their daily routines. There are a wide range of reasons behind
people
Use synonyms
's willingness to discuss personal finance and
this
Linking Words
 trend remains controversial whether it is a positive or negative development. Interestingly,
people
Use synonyms
 are likely to exchange their ideas about their earnings for several reasons. First of all, in order to achieve long-term financial stability and prosperity, individuals should share their own experiences and take other's advice.
For example
Linking Words
, by adopting healthy financial habits and attitudes,
people
Use synonyms
 would be able to cultivate economic resilience, freedom, and peace of mind.
Secondly
Linking Words
, attention-seeking
people
Use synonyms
 may have a desire to show off their savings and spending.
Therefore
Linking Words
, boastful
people
Use synonyms
 would try to prove themselves by talking about wages and salaries.
Finally
Linking Words
, in many countries, as
people
Use synonyms
 would like to be aware of the exchange rates and the cost of commercial commodities, they are conversing with each other. Despite the positives of money as a means, nowadays, the majority of
people
Use synonyms
 are likely to find an easy high-paying job and
as a consequence
Linking Words
, they may encounter bribery and corruption.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, since money plays an important role in our societies, most
people
Use synonyms
 would try to establish relationships with wealthier partners.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the bond of friendships or relationships could be indissoluble.
However
Linking Words
, by sharing their personal finance, they can lose their privacy and it can bring several troubles. In conclusion, judging someone's earnings and expenditures would be beneficial for
people
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 there could be negatives.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Enhance the development of your main ideas with more varied and detailed examples to demonstrate your arguments more convincingly.
coherence cohesion
Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas across sentences and paragraphs more seamlessly.
task achievement
To improve clarity, ensure that you make a clear stance on the question asked, especially in your conclusion, where a definitive judgement on the development being positive or negative should be presented.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumerism
  • materialism
  • economic disparity
  • transparency
  • financial planning
  • financial stress
  • culture of comparison
  • societal taboos
  • financial literacy
  • savings
  • investments
What to do next:
Look at other essays: