IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks, and motorcycles are banned from the city center. Public transportation like buses, taxis, and metros are advised. To what extent do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages

#cities #vehicle-free #cars #trucks #motorcycles #city #center #transportation #buses #taxis #metros #policy
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent decades, enormous pollution is in evidence, in which the majority part of it belongs to transportation engines.
Thus
Linking Words
, in order to solve
this
Linking Words
 problem, numerous solutions have been proposed, in which developing
public
Correct article usage
a public
show examples
 transportation system is one of the practical keys. In terms of public
transporting’s
Replace the word
transport’s
show examples
 cons, it limits
Use synonyms
time
Correct article usage
the time
show examples
 flexibility of people and they should manage their
time
Use synonyms
 with buses and taxis. It is readily apparent that if they delay, they
could not
Wrong verb form
cannot
show examples
 get them. In some cases, they are not regular as clockwork.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 system cannot be utilized
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
specific times,
such
Linking Words
 as
ending
Correct article usage
the ending
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 of schools and organizations, because of the congestion. Specifically, during
Corona virus
Correct your spelling
Coronavirus
show examples
 pandemic, it was infeasible to use it.
Not to mention
Linking Words
 that if there is a free-day
transporting
Replace the word
transportation
show examples
, the stations will be busy.
In addition
Linking Words
, the rate of crimes skyrockets in metros and trains. To put it differently, the congested subways make a readily way to pickpocket.
However
Linking Words
, a plethora of positive aspects of public engines are known. The crucial issue of air pollution jeopardizes citizens’ health.
Consequently
Linking Words
, they face a myriad of diseases; and
also
Linking Words
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should spend a heavy budget on hygiene.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
Ozone
Add an article
the Ozone
show examples
 layer would be conserved and prevented from depleting through declining greenhouse gases.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there would be no need to spend much
time
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
through
Change preposition
because of
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 downward tendency of private cars. Spontaneously, the rate of accidents falls down
a long
Correct your spelling
along
show examples
 with a decrement in cars.
For instance
Linking Words
, Tehran, as a megacity, is threatened by a lot of private vehicles,
however
Linking Words
, different types of public
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
,
such
Linking Words
 as BRT, Metro, taxis, buses, and bikes have been constructed for city dwellers.
To conclude
Linking Words
, transporting is
Add an article
an importance
show examples
importance
Replace the word
important
show examples
 part of everyone,
as well as
Linking Words
 considering the way of doing it. Despite
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a myriad of
public’s
Change noun form
public
show examples
 hurdles, it could
weight
Correct your spelling
weigh
show examples
 the private
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
,
due to
Linking Words
 preserving not only
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 people’s health.
Submitted by TUTOO on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure a clear structure is present in your essay. Begin with an introduction that outlines your argument, follow with body paragraphs that each focus on a specific point with examples, and conclude by summarizing your stance.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to clearly connect your ideas and paragraphs. While you have some structure, smoother transitions could enhance the flow of your essay.
Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, make sure your essay directly addresses the question. Your essay should explore the extent to which the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, making your position clear.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. While you mention general benefits and drawbacks of public transportation, including detailed examples or statistics could strengthen your essay.
General Advice
Check your essay for grammatical errors and unclear sentences. Polishing your language use can enhance the clarity and professionalism of your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • air pollution
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • public health
  • traffic congestion
  • pedestrians
  • cyclists
  • walking and biking
  • chronic diseases
  • boost to local businesses
  • tourism appeal
  • infrastructure strain
  • accessibility
  • inconvenience
  • negative impacts
  • public resistance
  • personal freedom
What to do next:
Look at other essays: