Some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others believe that children learn team work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #sport #children #team #work

Some people argue that participating in

sports

encourages children to be competitive

while

others argue that it educates them

how

Change preposition

on how

show examples

work

on a

team

This

essay will discuss how

sports

can develop

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

competitiveness and

team

Correct your spelling

teamwork

show examples

work

in children and why a balance of both is necessary

Change preposition

for

show examples

them.

To begin

with, participating in

sport activity

Fix the agreement mistake

sports activities

show examples

can help kids develop their competitiveness. During

this

activity, they can learn the importance of hard

work

and determination in order to win. It

also

motivates them to do better than their

last

game and achieve new goals.

For instance

, Michael Jordan was deemed to be not good enough to play basketball on his school varsity. And

this

became his motivation to strive harder. To

this

day, he is one of the greatest basketball

player

Change to a plural noun

players

show examples

all-time

Correct your spelling

all time

show examples

Thus

, being competitive is good with the right amount.

On the other hand

sports

can help children how to

work

with other teammates. It will teach them that it is easier to share workloads with others.

This

can help them know the strengths and weaknesses of others and the things they can contribute in order to achieve their goal.

For example

, in

football

Add a comma

football,

show examples

it requires a

team

to succeed. Each player

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

their

roles

Fix the agreement mistake

role

show examples

such

as the center and

goal keeper

Correct your spelling

goalkeeper

show examples

. They all

work

together in order to score.

Hence

, playing

Change preposition

apply

show examples

sports

can educate kids about the importance of working in a

team

. In conclusion, competitiveness and

team

Correct your spelling

teamwork

show examples

work

can be learned through

sports

. A balance of both can have significant benefits in their lives.

Submitted by yoko.onerom on Mon Mar 11 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout the essay, introducing each viewpoint individually before merging them into your own opinion. This helps in maintaining a smooth flow of ideas.

Coherence and Cohesion

Include a clear introduction stating the essay topics and your thesis. Make sure your conclusion summarizes the discussed views and clearly states your opinion, reinforcing the arguments presented.

Coherence and Cohesion

Support your main points with more detailed examples and explanations. Providing specific, real-life instances can strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.

Task Response

Address the task by discussing both viewpoints equally and providing a clear, personal opinion. Make sure your response fully covers all aspects of the prompt for a comprehensive answer.

Task Response

Enhance task achievement by ensuring that your ideas are comprehensive and well-explained. Your opinion should be evident and supported throughout the essay, not just in the conclusion.

Task Response

Use specific examples to support your arguments. While some are provided, expanding on these or incorporating additional, relevant examples can further enhance your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

260 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others believe that children learn team work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that exercise is the key to health, while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

In some countries even though the rate of serious crimes are decreasing, people feel less safe than ever before. What do you think are the cause of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it?

Some people believe that a natural ability is needed to be successful at sport, others believe that hardwork and discipline is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Use relevant ideas and examples

Fresh water has become a global problem for the world.What are the causes of it.What meaaures government and individual should take to resolve to the problem?Give reaaon e.g for your answer :