The use of social media e.g facebook and twitter is replacing face to face contact for many people in everyday life. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
It is clear that
the use of social media forums like facebook
and Capitalize word
Facebook
twitter
is taking over physical contact for Capitalize word
Twitter
majority
of the population in daily life. Add an article
the majority
This
essay will argue that the merits of this
outweigh the demerits. It will further
demonstrate that,
connecting through the internet saves Remove the comma
apply
time
and improves social network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
although
it can lead to untrue picture
of real content.
On the Fix the agreement mistake
pictures
one
hand, communicating with individuals via online platforms is time saving
. By Add a hyphen
time-saving
this
I mean that the moment that could be used to commute from Add a comma
this,
one
point to another in-order
to deliver information can be saved for doing a different rewarding activity. Correct your spelling
in order
For instance
, in the past years, human beings used to travel to
long distances to deliver information and Change preposition
apply
this
was time consuming
as they could take several hours to reach the desired destination. Add a hyphen
time-consuming
Additionally
, it has led to improvement in social networking as one
online post is viewed by millions of people. If a citizen has a very big issue such
as illness and he posts that he requires assistance, a crowd of people who are touched by the request help even if they are not related with
Change preposition
to
this
particular person by blood.
On the other hand
, unreal content has been revealed out
when people Change preposition
apply
finally
meet physically. That is
to say that, those who chat through this
platforms Correct determiner usage
these
oftenly
hide Correct your spelling
often
the
real photograph of them. As an example, some youngsters in Kenya date through these community networks for a Change the word
their
longtime
and place their emotions Correct your spelling
long time
to
these strangers but Change preposition
on
then
when they finally
organize for a one on
Add a hyphen
one-on-one
one
meeting, they become greatly disappointed by the true image of the stranger.
In conclusion, the fact that communicating through the internet is less time consuming
and enables better connection outweighs the concern that it leads to false imagery.Add a hyphen
time-consuming
Submitted by rebecckwamboka96 on
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task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the question and effectively outlines the advantages and disadvantages of the use of social media over face-to-face contact. However, to achieve a higher score in task response, ensure that you dive deeper into analyzing both sides of the argument. Consider the broader implications of each point and how they relate to the overarching question.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, for improving coherence and cohesion, try incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases to create smoother transitions between ideas. Also, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea that supports the overarching thesis of your essay.
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