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Writing Samples
Band 6

The maps show changes that took place in Youngsville in New Zealand over a 25 year period from 1980 to 2005. What is the most noticeable difference between the two maps?

The maps show changes that took place in Youngsville in New Zealand over a 25 year period from 1980 to 2005. What is the most noticeable difference between the two maps?
#maps #show #changes #place #youngsville #zealand #year #period #difference #two
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The map
show
Change the form of the verb
shows
show examples
 how Youngsville in New Zealand changed over a
25- year
Correct your spelling
25-year
 period from 1980 to 2005. Generally,
it is clear that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Youngsville
see
Wrong verb form
is seeing
show examples
 major changes. Most noticeably, there are many trees
were
Correct pronoun usage
that were
show examples
 knocked down to way for factories and skyscrapers.
Additionally
, there was a railway was installed in the
north east
Correct your spelling
northeast
show examples
 of
this
 city. In
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of the north, over 25 year period, the area has witnessed big changes
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the arrival of the railroad in the northeast which
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 redeveloped. Many trees were cut down to replace
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a park and a car park. In the
north east
Correct your spelling
northeast
show examples
, A stadium, car park and railway were constructed where the
resident
Fix the agreement mistake
residents
show examples
 houses used to
between
Add a missing verb
be between
show examples
 1980 and 2005. Look at the detailed images in the south, the houses and more trees have been profoundly affected over the 2 decades and were replaced by factories and skyscrapers. The school and the airport were still maintained. All of the buildings were erected period from 1980 to 2005. A warehouse was built near the factories.
Submitted by quynhtranhbh on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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