Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

#adults #time #computer #games #development

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In contemporary times, many adults opt to spend their leisure time engrossed in computer

games

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This

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shift in

behavior

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behaviour

show examples

can be attributed to the allure of immersive digital

entertainment

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However

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while

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gaming offers moments of enjoyment and relaxation, its excessive indulgence can have detrimental effects on both physical and mental well-being. It is undeniable that technology has become deeply integrated into modern society, permeating various aspects of daily life. The prevalence of three-dimensional video

games

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, accessible through a plethora of platforms and applications, has captivated the attention of adults seeking

entertainment

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. These

games

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boast captivating visuals, engaging narratives, and competitive elements, which contribute to their widespread popularity. As individuals strive to excel and achieve higher scores, they may become ensnared in the addictive cycle of gaming, dedicating excessive amounts of time to virtual pursuits.

Nevertheless

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, the excessive consumption of digital

entertainment

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can have adverse implications for health. Research conducted in the UK indicates a rise in health issues among young individuals, including fatigue and mental illness, attributed to a lack of physical activity. Prolonged periods of sedentary

behavior

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behaviour

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not only contribute to physical ailments but

also

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foster unhealthy habits.

Additionally

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, exposure to violent video

games

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has been linked to desensitization to violence and aggressive

behavior

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behaviour

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, posing risks to societal well-being. In conclusion,

while

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computer

games

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offer a source of amusement and diversion, their overindulgence can lead to unintended consequences. It is imperative for individuals to strike a balance between digital

entertainment

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and real-world activities to safeguard their physical and mental health. By

practicing

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practising

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moderation and mindfulness in their leisure pursuits, adults can derive enjoyment from gaming

while

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prioritizing their

overall

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well-being.

Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on Wed Mar 13 2024

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coherence cohesion

Provide a clearer distinction between paragraphs to enhance the logical flow of your essay. Each paragraph should focus on a distinct idea with a clear topic sentence at the start.

task achievement

To fully address the prompt, ensure your essay includes both an analysis of why many adults prefer to play computer games, and a balanced discussion on the positive and negative implications of this trend.

task achievement

Incorporate more specific examples and evidence to illustrate your points. This could include statistical data, findings from studies, or anecdotal examples that directly support your argument.

coherence cohesion

Provide a clear introduction and conclusion to your essay. In the introduction, briefly outline the points you plan to discuss, and in the conclusion, summarize your main arguments and state your personal opinion on the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Several languages are in danger of extinct. These are spoken by small number of people. Some people say that government should spend public money on saving these languages while other believe that it would be wasted of money discuss both who and give your opinion.

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development?

It is sometimes said people should be encouraged to get married before the age of 30 as it is best for society.do u agree or disagree

Some people think that all lawbreakers should be taken into prison. In contrast, others believe there are better alternatives (for example, doing work or learning skills in the community). Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.