Te growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing. Do you agree or disagree?

#te #growth #shops #towns #cities

It is predicted that in the near future, retail shops and shopping mall centres will be closed

due to

the expansion of online shopping networks. I agree with

this

opinion inasmuch as products can be found in more diversity, though the customers can save their time.

In addition

, stores in the cities and towns have more expenditure than online markets.

To begin

with, recently

while

online shops have been incredibly expanded in societies, the number of shopping centres have been decreased significantly.

As a result

, the costs that should be paid by a store owner are higher than the costs in webshops.

For instance

, a boutique will be charged for different aspects;

such

as electricity, water and maintenance,

while

an online shop can be managed remotely with a lower charge.

Therefore

, the owners would rather extend their online market by investing more in

this

field and

then

take

Wrong verb form

taking

show examples

more benefits.

Moreover

while

recently, it can be seen that people intend to surf the internet to find the best option for their requirements, online webshops have been more popular among adults compared to stores in cities.

For example

, if someone wanted to buy a yellow dress, they would find it online easily by taking only some minutes,

whereas

it would take so long in a city centre.

Furthermore

, individuals can not be sure whether they will find what they are looking for.

To conclude

, it is estimated that one day all malls will be closed and demand for buying online will rise. In my opinion, many women and men prefer to have more choices, and the internet provides them with many varieties in less than a second.

Thus

, the number of boutiques in different areas will be limited soon

Submitted by mannadarshpal13 on Thu Mar 14 2024

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task response

Ensure your introduction offers a clear overview of your position without too much detail, then expand your reasons in the body paragraphs.

task response

Support your main points with more detailed examples or evidence. While some examples are given, they could be more specific and detailed to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Organize your essay more effectively with clearer paragraphing and linking words. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea, supported by examples or further explanation.

coherence cohesion

Use a wider range of linking devices to make the relationships between your ideas clearer. Incorporate words and phrases that indicate contrast, cause-and-effect, and addition to guide your reader through your argument.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion should summarise your main points and restate your position more clearly. It's essential to reinforce the argument you've made throughout the essay in the concluding paragraph.

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16Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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