Some people feel that entertainers such as film stars, pop musicians, or sports stars are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of jobs should be highly paid?

Some people think that the salaries of famous musicians, movie stars, and sports celebrities are too high.
This
essay discusses why I agree with the statement and which other careers should be paid more. I strongly agree that celebrities' salaries are too high.
This
is because their earnings are disproportionally higher than those of non-known artists.
For instance
, I am at the beginning of my artistic career and, very often, I find myself struggling to pay rent and other essential bills. Another reason why I think
this
statement is true is that most well-known entertainer often spends a lot of cash on luxury products. The reason for
this
might be that they are constantly trying to prove their social status by purchasing futile items,
such
as jewellery, cars, or mansions.
On the other hand
, other careers should earn more. The first of these are health-related positions,
such
as doctors, nurses, and dentists.
This
is because people's lives depend on
this
type of work and
therefore
, they should be paid
accordingly
. Another profession that should have a higher wage is educators,
such
as schoolteachers. The reason for
this
is that education is one of the most important pillars of a developed society.
Consequently
, educational workers' pay should be higher
due to
their responsibility to the country's teaching system. In conclusion, my reasons to believe that celebrities are paid too much are that they receive a disproportional amount of cash in comparison to beginner artists and that they are often keen on spending their salaries on luxury items. The professions that should be paid a lot more than they usually do are health-related positions and educators.
Submitted by amandacflago23 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear and concise main topic sentence to guide the reader through your argument. This helps in maintaining a logical flow throughout the essay.
task achievement
In the body paragraphs, focus on developing your ideas further with more detailed examples. Providing specific cases or statistics can strengthen your argument and support your main points more convincingly.
task achievement
While presenting your view, ensure that it is consistent and clear from the introduction to the conclusion. Avoid making statements that might seem contradictory or unclear to maintain a strong stance throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas and paragraphs seamlessly. This also helps in making your essay more readable and engaging.

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