IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In some countries, students pay their college or university fees, while in some others, the government pays for them. Do the advantages of governments paying for fees outweigh the disadvantages?

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In many nations, the debate over who should shoulder the burden of tertiary
education
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 expenses—whether it's the authorities or the students themselves—has ignited significant controversy. Advocates for government-funded university
education
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 argue that it promotes widespread access to higher learning,
while
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 opponents contend that
such
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 funding often results in the misallocation of public
funds
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. By delving into both perspectives, we can gain a more nuanced understanding of
this
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 complex issue. On one hand, proponents of government-funded tertiary
education
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 argue that it fosters equal opportunities for
education
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 by removing financial barriers, particularly for those from less privileged backgrounds. Consider the case of my orphaned cousin, who was able to attend the University of Sudbury thanks to the
education
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 funding provided by the Ontario province. Without
this
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 support, the prospect of paying for her tuition would have been daunting, if not impossible.
This
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 example illustrates how government funding can level the playing field and provide access to
education
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 for individuals who might
otherwise
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 be excluded.
However
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, critics of government-funded
education
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 raise valid concerns about the potential misuse of public
funds
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. They argue that many students, particularly those with full-time jobs, are financially capable of covering their own tuition fees.
For instance
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, my best friend, despite having a steady income, chose to spend her salary on luxury items like clothing and designer bags rather than using it to pay for her
education
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.
This
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 misuse of
funds
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 underscores the argument that government subsidies may not always be allocated to those who truly need them, resulting in a waste of taxpayer money. In conclusion, the debate surrounding government-funded tertiary
education
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 is multifaceted and contentious.
While
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 proponents emphasize the importance of accessibility and equal opportunity, opponents highlight the potential inefficiencies and misallocation of public
funds
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. Ultimately, striking a balance between providing support for those in need and ensuring fiscal responsibility is crucial in navigating
this
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 complex issue. By critically examining both viewpoints, we can develop a more comprehensive understanding of the dynamics at play in government-funded
education
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.

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task response
To enhance your score, make sure that your introduction clearly presents the main argument and sets a clear direction for the rest of the essay. A more precise thesis statement could further refine this.
coherence and cohesion
Integrate a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas more smoothly between and within paragraphs, and use topic sentences effectively at the beginning of paragraphs to guide the reader through your argument.
task response
In discussing advantages and disadvantages, aim to provide a balanced analysis by dedicating equal discussion to both sides. This will give your essay a more rounded perspective and enhance its argumentative structure.
task response
For clearer comprehensive ideas, focus on deepening the analysis of each point. Rather than merely stating examples, explore their implications and how they specifically support your main argument more robustly.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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