You would liek to participate in a work-related seminar in another country. Write a letter to the person in charge of the seminar and ask for detailed information regarding the dates, program, accomodation and cost.

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Dear Sir / Madam, I am writing
this
to express my interest in participating in
work-related
Add an article
a work-related
the work-related
show examples
seminar
which is being organized in India.
This
seminar
will be really helpful for my professional growth.
Firstly
, I would like to know the dates of the program so that I can plan my travel
accordingly
and
also
want to know about the program structure. If I can get those details in advance, I can come well-prepared for the
seminar
. I
also
have some other plans apart from the
seminar
and knowing the schedule beforehand will help me to plan my travel.
Furthermore
, since it's happening in another country, I
also
wanted to know about the accommodation arrangements and do I have to make arrangements by
self
Correct your spelling
myself
show examples
or it will be included as
apart
Correct your spelling
a part
show examples
of the
seminar
?
Lastly
, can you please provide me
the
Add the preposition
with the
show examples
cost of the
seminar
and what is the
last
date to pay the fees? please let me know if anything is required from my side. Regards, Tirth T
Submitted by tirththakkar23 on

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Greeting and Closing
While you have a clear structure to your letter, improvement can be made by adding a formal closing sentence after your final question, directly before the signing off with 'Regards'. This could include a sentence thanking the recipient for their time or assistance, making your letter more polite and complete.
Complete Response
Your letter has shown strong task achievement by clearly stating the purpose and asking for specific information related to the seminar. However, to ensure a more comprehensive approach, consider including a brief mention of how you learned about the seminar and why you believe it will assist in your professional growth. This provides context and makes your request more compelling.
Logical Structure
While your letter demonstrates good coherence and cohesion with a logical structure and clear paragraphing, consider using a wider range of linking phrases to connect your ideas more fluidly. For example, transitions like 'In addition to this...' or 'Moreover...' can help bridge your queries more smoothly.
Complete Response
To improve your score in task achievement, ensure that every query related to the seminar is clearly articulated and relevant. While you've covered the essential aspects well, elaborating on why each piece of information is important for your planning or participation could strengthen your letter.
Suitable Writing Tone
Maintain a consistent and suitable formal tone throughout. You've managed this well, but be mindful of informal phrases or contractions that could slip in, as they would detract from the professionalism of your letter. Phrases like 'please let me know' could be more formally rendered as 'I would appreciate being informed about...'

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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