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Band 5

People from poor and rural background find it difficult to get a university education.Some people think that government should make it easier for them to enter universities. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

#people #background #university #education #government #universities
Whether
government
Correct article usage
the government
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shoud
Correct your spelling
should
 provide
Correct article usage
a free-college
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free-college
Correct your spelling
free college
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 policy or not is considered
as
Change preposition
apply
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a controversial topic of interest among students . The writer of
this
esaay
Correct your spelling
essay
 agrees with that notion
due to
 the increase in
workfoce's
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workfoce
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 quality
as well as
 allowing people who have poor
background
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backgrounds
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 to land a decent job . It must be recognised that the action of
government
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the government
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 abolishing tuition fees in
university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
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 creates a more educated
workfoce
Correct your spelling
workforce
.
That is
 to say , the demand from the recruiters in the recent era
have
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has
show examples
 been increasing inexorably as they require not only
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
higher qualifications but
also
 actual skills which can be gained from the
university
 course .
Thus
 , if everyone is entitled to
university
Correct article usage
a university
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 education , they can learn and
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
 these useful skills , leading to a more educated
workfoce
Correct your spelling
workforce
.
Therefore
 ,
this
 will lead to a brighter future
of
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for
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
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 nation Another key which should be considered is the provision of
free-of-charge
Add an article
the free-of-charge
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university
 will be a generous decision of
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 when it comes to the
underprivilleged
Correct your spelling
underprivileged
 people . To explain
further
 ,
for
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apply
show examples
those who have talent
which is needed
Wrong verb form
that needs
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 to be explored ,
however
 , can not attend
university
course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
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as a result
 of a poor socio-economic background .
This
 means ,
since
Correct word choice
that since
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 the
government
 pursue college without
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
show examples
, it will provide poor people an opportunity to not only learn at
university
 but
also
 explore their potential , leading to a better future when they can earn a decent income . In conclusion , the writer undoubtfully
agree
Correct subject-verb agreement
agrees
show examples
 with the decision of
government
Correct article usage
the government
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waiving
Change the verb form
to waive
show examples
 tuition fees as the result of creating a more educated
Correct your spelling
workforce
work force
workfoce
Correct your spelling
workforce
 and providing a better future
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 one's life
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coherence cohesion
Revise essay structure to include a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Ensure each part serves its purpose: introducing the topic, developing arguments, and summarizing the essay.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical flow of ideas by using linking phrases more effectively between sentences and paragraphs. This will help the reader to follow your argument more easily.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, elaborate your points with more concrete and varied examples. This helps in demonstrating a thorough understanding of the topic and strengthens your argument.
task achievement
Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation for a more polished and professional essay. Consider revising sentences that may be too long or complex for clearer communication.
task achievement
Your essay can benefit from a more balanced approach. Discussing opposing viewpoints can enhance the depth of your analysis and demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the issue.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
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