Some people believe that criminals should be put into prison as long as possible. However, others believe that it is necessary to educate those people in local community. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
Nowdays
, there is an Correct the word
Nowadays
opinion
that Use synonyms
criminals
should be Use synonyms
prisoned
for Verb problem
imprisoned
a
longer time Correct article usage
apply
periods
, Correct the article-noun agreement
period
Linking Words
however
some believe that it would be better for Add a comma
however,
a
society to educate those Correct article usage
apply
people
. It is not a trivial question, and have complex sides, it would be better to help find a way to return an ordinary Use synonyms
live
for some Replace the word
life
criminals
, Use synonyms
on the other
Linking Words
hand
some of them do not deserve a Add the comma(s)
hand,
second
Use synonyms
chance
. Use synonyms
For
my personal Change the preposition
In
opinion
, those who killed, raped, Use synonyms
physically
abused others do not deserve to have Correct word choice
and physically
an
access Correct article usage
apply
Use synonyms
education
.
Change preposition
to education
People
who are Use synonyms
prisoned
for Verb problem
imprisoned
a
robbing, vandalism or small fraud, should have a Correct article usage
apply
second
Use synonyms
chance
, especially Use synonyms
younger
generation, because statistically teenagers who commit crimes are usually from abusive Correct article usage
the younger
envirenment
, and they do not even have an Correct your spelling
environment
environments
apportunity
to get an Correct your spelling
opportunity
education
. Use synonyms
Moreover
, prisoning will destroy those Linking Words
people
, Use synonyms
hence
no one would like to hire them because of their past, and they will return to previous Linking Words
habbits
. Correct your spelling
habits
Therefore
, getting Linking Words
Use synonyms
education
in Add an article
an education
the
prison will be beneficial for both Correct article usage
apply
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
criminals
a criminal
criminals
and Use synonyms
a
humanity.
Remove the article
apply
On the other hand
, there are Linking Words
people
who killed, raped or physically abused others, for my personal Use synonyms
opinion
, they do not deserve to be returned to free Use synonyms
live
. Those Replace the word
life
people
should be Use synonyms
issolated
from Correct your spelling
isolated
a
society and Remove the article
apply
do
not have a Unnecessary verb
apply
chance
to return Use synonyms
their
previous lives, the reason for Change preposition
to their
this
is that they took or destroyed other Linking Words
Use synonyms
people
lives. Even if those Change noun form
people's
criminals
have Use synonyms
an
access to an Remove the article
apply
education
, they would be more likely to commit a Use synonyms
second
crime.
In conclusion, giving Use synonyms
an
Remove the article
apply
education
and a Use synonyms
second
Use synonyms
chance
depends Use synonyms
from
Change preposition
on
a
crime that Correct article usage
the
individual
Correct article usage
an individual
commited
. Correct your spelling
committed
For
my Change the preposition
In
opinion
, if Use synonyms
crime
is not related to Add an article
the crime
a crime
Correct article usage
the physicall
physicall abusion
of others, they should have Correct your spelling
physical abuse
an
access to Remove the article
apply
a
Correct article usage
apply
knowledges
.Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
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Introduction
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Coherence & Cohesion
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Task Achievement
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General
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Task Achievement
Work on making your opinion clear throughout the essay, not just in the conclusion. This will improve task achievement by showing a consistent line of argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a variety of linking words to improve the flow of your essay and the connections between your ideas. This will improve coherence and cohesion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.