Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give you own opinion.

In some individuals, there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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a
believe
Replace the word
belief
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that the way to handle a bad experience is to voluntarily accept it,
such
as lack of money or a very bad profession.
While
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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others believe that any unpleasant
situations
Fix the agreement mistake
situation
show examples
can be changed if they
give
Verb problem
put
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some effort
on
Change preposition
into
show examples
it. I firmly believe that any kind of external situation that we are currently in can be managed into something we
desired
Wrong verb form
desire
show examples
better. Those who
inclined
Add a missing verb
are inclined
show examples
towards
acceptance
often emphasize the importance of resilience and contentment in the middle of unfavored experiences. They argue that
acceptance
can be energy-saving and help them to focus on more controllable situations. By coming
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
terms
like
Change preposition
with
show examples
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of money or
less-than-fulfilling
Correct article usage
a less-than-fulfilling
show examples
job, they can have more peace of mind and emotional stability.
Conversely
, people who
cares
Change the verb form
care
show examples
for
improvement
assert that being stagnant is an action to
hinder
Wrong verb form
hinders
show examples
themselves
Correct pronoun usage
their
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to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
personal growth. They argue
challenging
Add an article
the challenging
show examples
situation is the best time to become more innovative and creative. By actively seeking ways to enhance one’s job satisfaction or financial situation, an individual demonstrates resilience and determination in the face of problems. Considering these contrasting views, it is evident that both
acceptance
and
improvement
have their own merits.
While
acceptance
can lead to temporary peace and
stress-free
Correct your spelling
stress
show examples
,
improvement
can benefit with genuine satisfaction and long-term fulfillment. In my personal opinion, the
later
Correct your spelling
latter
show examples
view is better for individuals, by embracing a mindset of continuous
improvement
, individuals can navigate challenges in life.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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Task Achievement
Expand on your examples to provide more depth. While you've mentioned general strategies people may adopt, including specific situations or anecdotal evidence could enhance the persuasiveness of your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures and using a wider range of linking words to improve the flow of your essay. This will make your points more distinctly and naturally connected, enhancing overall readability.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • adversity
  • resilience
  • stoicism
  • contentment
  • cope
  • adapt
  • endure
  • persevere
  • settle
  • ambition
  • tenacious
  • determined
  • resourceful
  • optimistic
  • self-improvement
  • proactive
  • initiative
  • transform
  • overcome
  • confront
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