Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. to what extents do you agree or disagree with this statement?

it
was
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is
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widely accepted that there
is
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are
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contentious arguments about residents who
have spoken
Wrong verb form
speak
show examples
different languages, which encourage
a
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apply
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serious social problems and practical issues. With
Correct article usage
the afvances
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afvances
Correct your spelling
advances
advanced
of technology and society, there are several conflicts between natives and immigrants. There are plausible reasons that language
barrier
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barriers
show examples
and
acceped
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accepted
cognition can cause a tremendous effect in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
long run. On top of that, a number of
people
who relocate to other countries or go abroad to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different content have been
clamied
Correct your spelling
claimed
that there is
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
difference in cultural atmosphere and their organized cognitive aspects.
First,
natives have intrinsic unexpected racism as they evenly don't understand
about
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apply
show examples
what it is criteria to
definition
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define
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intruding foreigners' personal rights and cultural difficulties. Take Korea
forexample
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for example
,
where
Correct word choice
which
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have
Wrong verb form
had
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undergone a disastrous civil war in 1950, as many
Korean
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Koreans
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think that talking about north
korea
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Korea
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is too rude,
while
other
nation's
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nations
show examples
people
don't realize
implications
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the implications
show examples
it brings.
Furthermore
,
this
can contribute to misunderstanding.
people
who
raised
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were raised
show examples
in different nations have different lexical resources,
grammer
Correct your spelling
grammar
context structures
as well as
their own slag. especially, community who have bachelor's
degree
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degrees
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or undergraduate
degree
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degrees
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, as they possess high academic accomplishments,
while
they are hard to fully understand in no time. there
differ
Verb problem
are different
show examples
comprehensive skills and muscle memories.
To sum up
, there are convincing
argument
Fix the agreement mistake
arguments
show examples
that living in a country where several
people
have to speak not in one's native language
conducive
Add a missing verb
is conducive
show examples
to encouraging
serios
Correct your spelling
serious
issues,
while
this
can be accepted
this
might be a misunderstanding of their faulty understanding.
Submitted by gayoung9011 on

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Task Response
Your essay attempts to address the prompt, but the response remains partly incomplete as it lacks a clear statement of your position regarding the argument mentioned. To improve, ensure your introduction includes a thesis statement that clearly states your opinion on the topic. Additionally, your conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your position more explicitly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay presents several ideas but lacks a coherent structure and smooth transitions between them. To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider organizing your essay into distinct paragraphs, each focusing on a specific point. Use linking words ('Furthermore,' 'Moreover,' etc.) to connect your ideas more effectively. Also, each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea.
Task Achievement
You have included examples to support your points, but they are somewhat vague or not fully relevant to the argument you are making. To strengthen your essay, provide more specific, detailed examples that directly support your main ideas. Avoid generalizations and ensure your examples clearly connect to the point you're making in that paragraph.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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