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Band 3.5

You would liek to participate in a work-related seminar in another country. Write a letter to the person in charge of the seminar and ask for detailed information regarding the dates, program, accomodation and cost.

#seminar #country #person #charge #information #dates #program #accomodation #cost
Dear sir, I am writing to you to
aske
Correct your spelling
ask
some
quseitions
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questions
 about
seminar
Correct article usage
the seminar
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 which take place
on
Change preposition
in
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summer
Correct article usage
the summer
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. I have been
garduated
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graduated
 from university for more than 10 years. I have experience with more than 8 years
about
Change preposition
of
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 management.
due
to
Change preposition
For
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this
reason
Add a comma
reason,
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 I
interested
Add a missing verb
am interested
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 in participating
this
Change preposition
in this
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 seminar. I am working as
manager
Add an article
a manager
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 in company A ,
then
 they
support
Wrong verb form
are supporting
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 me in
this
 event. I want to know how and when can I book
hotel
Add an article
a hotel
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 or any
cordination
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coordination
combination
 with you.
How ever
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However
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, I want to plan my work to have efficient time to make
net work
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network
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 in
this
 event
and
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apply
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.
on the other hand
, I have to send the cost of
this
 event to our accountant
facelty
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faculty
facility
 and they pay the
expences
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expenses
show examples
. I looking forward to hearing from you as soon as possible. Yours sincerely amir
Submitted by basirat.amirhosein on

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Grammar and Accuracy
Consider proofreading your letter to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure for clearer communication.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use paragraphing to organize your letter more effectively. Each paragraph should cover a specific topic, such as your background, questions about the seminar, and payment details.
Task Achievement
While you have mentioned your interest and background relevant to the seminar, providing more specific details about your request (e.g., exact dates, parts of the program you're interested in) would strengthen your response to the task.
Tone and Formality
To enhance the tone and formality of the letter, avoid using contractions (e.g., use 'I am' instead of 'I'm') and ensure proper capitalization and punctuation are used throughout.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

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