IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

#Essay1 ☘️ Agree/Disagree ✅ Q: Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#q #country #language
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Living in a country where
one
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 has to speak a
language
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 other than their native tongue could lead to quite disturbing problems, both on a social level and a practical
one
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.
Therefore
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, I am in complete agreement with the statement. A
language
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 barrier often translates into other forms of barriers,
in addition
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 to basic communication. To order something online or through the phone,
for example
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, a person should have some understanding of the service provider’s
language
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,
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otherwise
Add a comma
otherwise,
show examples
 they would probably not be able to place an order. The same problem occurs when
one
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 goes on a job interview, especially
one
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that is
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 not in person. Without a clear understanding of the employer’s
language
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, the candidate is unlikely to make the best first impression and obtain the job.
While
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 less severe in
everyday
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every day
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, especially face-to-face, interactions, the problem still remains unresolved as missing even the most minute detail of an utterance might lead to misunderstanding and subsequent complications, most notably in understanding culture-bound norms, rituals, or propositions. What is more, a person with little understanding of a
language
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 may never find friends, at least lasting ones, or a lover as both cases would require in-depth discussions and arguments on a range of subjects to be held. It is true that there are non-verbal factors involved in any interaction,
such
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 as facial expressions and hand gestures, but they never even come close to clear articulation of
language
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 in terms of communicating the meaning the speaker has in mind.
This
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 very important missing factor tends to result in the breakdown of communication which in turn impedes the formation of a relationship. In conclusion, I believe a
language
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 barrier is nothing we can dismiss lightly, especially when living in a country where the official
language
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 is
one
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 we do not know. [297 words]
Submitted by g4832525 on

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Task Response
Ensure that the introduction clearly states your position on the question. While you did agree with the statement, making your thesis statement stronger would provide a clearer guide for the reader.
Task Response
Develop your ideas further with more specific examples. While you mentioned job interviews and making friends, adding real-life scenarios or more detailed examples could strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use paragraphing effectively to structure your essay. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea, followed by supporting sentences. Consider revising your essay to ensure each paragraph focuses on a single point for better clarity.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use linking words and phrases (e.g., Furthermore, Consequently, In contrast) to improve the flow of your essay and make the connection between ideas clearer.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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